You: So I watched the video you sent. I’m ready to meet and talk.
Rusty: Good. We have a lot to talk about. I’ve been doing a lot of work out at Aunt Karen’s house lately. You want to just meet out there?
You: No. I’m not ready to go back there. Not yet. Let’s meet somewhere neutral and just talk for now. Want to meet at the mall in Glen Cove?
Rusty: Don’t trust me, eh? Well, I get why the video might freak you out a little. But you’re safe with me, little brother.
You: Glen Cove tomorrow at about noon in the food court?
Rusty: Fine. See you then, Tommy. I’ve missed you.
Of course, I wasn’t going to the mall in Glen Cove or to Glen Cove at all. I was going to Karen’s house to finally finish this for good. I left home early in the morning, but with the drive time I still didn’t reach it until quarter til twelve. Parking up the road and out of sight, I walked in far enough to see there were no cars or other signs of Rusty hanging around. I still found myself wanting to hesitate, wanting to wait longer to make sure he had really gone, but I forced myself to stop. The time for excuses and waiting was over. It was time for me to stop being a fucking coward.
The exterior of the house looked the same aside from a fresh coat of paint and some flowers planted along the front of the porch. Climbing those steps was hard, but it wasn’t just sadness that I felt. There was anger there too. Anger at myself for all the mistakes I had made and things I had left undone, but also anger at Rusty. He had betrayed Harvey and me, but what’s more, he had betrayed himself. The version of Rusty that he could have been. A good brother and a good man. For what? Aunt Karen’s house and becoming more of a monster than Harvey had ever been.
It took three kicks for me to get the front door open. Stepping inside slowly, I looked around to make sure I wasn’t walking into a trap. I didn’t know Rusty at all anymore, and I couldn’t assume he wouldn’t kill me just as quickly as he had the poor girl on the video.
But as I walked through the house to the basement door, there was no sign of him or anyone else. Well, that’s not strictly true. Because even at a distance, I felt like I could somehow sense Harvey stirring down in the dark below me.
Blood thrummed in my ears as I opened the door and started down the stairs. The basement was well-lit with fluorescent lights, but at first I didn’t see anything different than what was on the video. A sparse room of cinderblock walls and a concrete floor that seemed peculiarly worn in the middle.
I stood at the bottom of the steps for several seconds before pushing myself closer. I thought I saw a slight disturbance in the air, but I couldn’t be sure. Then I heard a rumble that came and went quickly as a summer thunderclap. It was Harvey growling at me.
Stepping closer to the edge of the unseen circle, I knelt down. “Harvey? Do you know me? Oh God, I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry. Do you know me at all?”
There was a thickening of the air just a few inches away from my face, and I could barely make out the flicker of large amber eyes regarding me across the boundary that separated us. I was surprised when I realized I didn’t feel afraid anymore. Just happy to finally see Harvey again.
“Tommy? You came back?”
My hands went to my mouth as my vision started to swim. “Fuck. Yes, yes, Harvey. I came back. I’m so sorry it took so long. But I’m going to get you out of here now. I swear it.” I stood up as my eyes went to the ceiling. I didn’t see any hot water bottles up there or anything out of the ordinary at all. I was taking out a flashlight when Harvey spoke again.
“They’re not up there any more. He dug a trench in the floor years ago. Filled it with salt and covered it up.”
Heart sinking, I looked closer at the floor and saw he was right. There was a barely perceptible ridge of newer concrete all the way around. That motherfucker had decided to make Harvey’s prison permanent.
Looking up at Harvey’s eyes, I tried to smile. “Don’t worry. I’ll find something and break it up. Be right back.” Just then, my phone buzzed. It was Rusty.
Rusty: I see you at the house, Tommy. Got cameras all over now. Stay away from Harvey until I get there. I fucking mean it.
I gripped the phone tighter before jamming it back in my pocket. “Rusty knows I’m here, and he’s coming back, so I have to hurry. It should take him an hour to get here, so we should be okay.” Looking around the room, I asked, “Do you know where he keeps his tools?”
Harvey’s voice had been very faint and indistinct at first, but this time it sounded a bit clearer, a bit stronger. “I don’t know, but he always brought them from outside.”
The shed.
I ran out the exterior door and around the side of the house to where the old shed still sat lopsided and moldering. The only thing new about it was the padlock on the door. Fuck it. I didn’t have time for this shit.
It only took a few hits to break in one of the rotting boards lining the sides of the shed, and after that, it was short work to pry open a hole big enough for me to climb through. The interior was dark, with only small beams of sunlight poking through between the uneven slats of the roof. When I shined my flashlight around, I saw that the shed was both smaller and more filled with tools and junk than I remembered. It took several minutes of searching to find a hammer and a heavy screwdriver to use as a makeshift chisel, and while they weren’t the ideal tools for the job, I worried that wasting more time searching would be worse than going with what I had.
My first attempts at chipping away at the concrete did very little. First I used big, hard swings that sent the metal tip of the screwdriver this way and that, then I tried smaller taps that were too light. But after a few tries, I got into a rhythm of fast, hard strikes on the same spot and I started making progress. In just a few minutes I was sweating, though I wasn’t sure if it was from exertion and concentration or just my growing fear that Rusty was going to get here before I had cleared enough of the salt away. I let out a little yell as the screwdriver bit deeper. I had broken through to the bottom of the salt trench.
That’s when Harvey spoke again.
“Tommy, he’s almost here. I can sense him. You need to be very careful. He will kill you if you anger him enough.”
I shook my head. “I can handle him. I’m getting you out.”
“You need to understand this. There is no way to handle him. You don’t know the man he has become. If you continue trying to help me, he will try to kill you.”
I stopped for a moment and looked up into Harvey’s eyes. “Why are you telling me this?”
Harvey was silent for a moment as though considering before he spoke again. “Where I come from, there is a saying. ‘Everything is paid for.’”
“Yeah, I’ve heard versions of that here too.”
“Good. Maybe that will help you understand then. Rusty has to pay a price for all that he has done. So must you. So must I. Whether now or later, everything is paid for eventually.”
I went back to digging at the trench. “We can talk more about all that later. For now I need to get you out.”
“It’s too late. He’s already here.”
“Tommy! Tommy, you little shit, get away from him, get up here!” The screaming had started as soon as the front door opened, and he was at the top of the stairs in seconds. “I fucking mean it, Tom.”
I was prying wildly at the crack I had opened up, and a chunk of concrete flew up as Rusty started thundering down the steps. I looked up as he reached the bottom, and I felt my heart sink at what I saw.
He was still Rusty, but there was a wrongness to him now. My brother was always clever, and I’m sure he had learned to hide it well enough when he was in control of himself. But he wasn’t in control of himself now. His expression was wild and crazed, and as he dashed around the perimeter of Harvey’s prison to reach me, I saw the terrible truth of him in his eyes.
He wasn’t just willing to hurt and kill me. He wanted to.
I dodged to the side at the last moment, but he compensated and hit me in the ribs, falling on top of me even as I felt my shoulder crack painfully into the concrete floor. I tried to get away from him, but his hands were clawing at my shoulders and head as he tried to leverage himself into a better position atop me. In a second he’d be on my back and then it’d all be over.
So I did the only thing I had left to do. I took the hammer and swung it hard at his head.
The effect was immediate. His limbs went limp as he started to slide off me. I thought for a moment he was dead, but then his eyes started to flutter open as blood dripped down onto his eyelashes. By the time I was on my feet, his gaze was steady and hot as he started reaching for me again.
Enough of this. It was time to be done. Time to pay.
I stepped behind Rusty and wrapped my arm around his neck. He struggled weakly at first, but then he saw I didn’t mean to choke him out. Instead I was dragging us both inside of Harvey’s circle. He began screaming and wailing then, a newfound strength born out of terror making it harder to hold onto him as I crossed the hidden salt threshold. Gritting my teeth, I clung on tightly and fell backward, using my body weight to yank him the rest of the way inside.
Harvey was over us now, the air darkening as he took shape. He didn’t look like a particular animal now, or perhaps he looked like several. He had the broad, emaciated head of a starving bear perched on shoulders that were almost ape-like—except that they terminated in arms that were closer to entwined branches than flesh and bone. His hands, thin and well-articulated bits of clay and stone, reached out to Rusty’s face even as the man let out a pig-like squeal of terror. I smelled something foul and realized he had shit himself, and I couldn’t help but feel some dark satisfaction at the depth of his well-deserved fear.
I looked up at Harvey and grimaced. “Do it. End him. End both of us if you need to, just let me get you out first. I accept the price that has to be paid.”
Harvey’s gaunt countenance seemed to frown slightly at that. “No, Tommy. You misunderstand. Death is not the price. Death is no punishment at all. And Rusty’s price is for him alone.” Rusty had sank into petrified silence, but his mind wasn’t gone, at least not yet. He was listening carefully to what we were saying.
I looked at Harvey in confusion as I checked my grip on Rusty’s neck and wrapped my legs around his own. “What then? What are you going to do to him?”
Harvey looked almost sad. “My kind call it being made Dim. It is the worst punishment we have. Rusty will be bound to this place forever. Here, but not here. Seeing, but unseen. Knowing, but unknown. A shadow that can never leave, never die, never rest.”
I swallowed. “That’s his price? For all he’s done?”
Harvey nodded. “It is. Can you accept that? It will only take a moment, but I need him held still and I’m still too weak to do it myself.” I didn’t know what to say. I knew he deserved it, but the enormity of condemning someone to that kind of hell…
That’s when Rusty spoke up.
“You can fucking talk? All this time, you could fucking talk? I dedicated my life to you, taught you so much, and you never said a word to me. But you talk to him? Like I’m not even fucking here?”
Harvey’s gaze flared as he regarded Rusty, and I felt him begin to tremble again under the creature's glare. While I wasn’t afraid exactly, I couldn’t help but hold my breath. Even in his diminished state, Harvey looked somehow…regal. “You were never worth speaking to. Never my friend. You were nothing, and you'll soon be less than that.” His eyes went back to me. “Are you able to help in this?”
Rusty was trying to twist to see me now as he stammered out words fast and hard. “Tommy, don’t do it, man. I’m fucked up, I know it. But I’m your brother. I love you. This thing…I think it messed with me. Made me do bad things. It’s some kind of fucked up monster, and I don’t blame you for abandoning me, for leaving me with it, but I need you now. We can beat it together, just don’t let it…”
“Shut the fuck up.”
I felt Rusty tense slightly. “What?”
“I said shut up. I should have stopped you when we were kids, but I can’t change that. But I can sure as shit stop you from hurting him or anyone else ever again.”
Rusty gritted his teeth. “You picking that fucking thing, that fucking monster, over your own brother?”
I dug my forearm into his neck so hard I felt his tendons creak. “The only monster down here is you.” Looking up at Harvey, I nodded. “Do it.”
It really did happen quickly. Harvey trailed his fingers over Rusty’s face before pressing hard against his forehead. In a deeper, rumbling voice, he spoke a phrase as Rusty began to wail again for the final time. “Kravosch enlea. Selah.”
And then Rusty was just…gone. It was strange, because it wasn’t like he vanished, not exactly. It was more like he was sitting in the corner and I just kept forgetting he was there. I looked around, and I thought I saw a faint shadow nearby, but when I tried to focus on it, it went away. Turning back to Harvey as I sat up, I asked if that was it.
He nodded with a sigh. “Yes. Rusty’s part is finished.”
Standing up, I bent down and reached for the hammer. “Then let me finish getting you out.”
It took another twenty minutes to break enough of the barrier to free Harvey, and when I was finished, I set the tools down and asked him if it was time for me to pay my price too. He made a sound that might have been a chuckle as he slowly moved out of the circle.
“Help me outside if you will. We can talk about it there.”
I took his large, slender hands and felt myself wince at how fragile they felt in my grip. Trying to be gentle, I walked with him through the door and into the afternoon sunshine. The moment the light hit him, Harvey began to change. His head filled out and his body thickened from a slight figure to a massive frame that dwarfed my own. All across his body I could see new leaves and branches growing and filling in ragged gaps that had been there moments before, and across his broad, barrel chest I could see flowering moss spreading like deep green fur.
I couldn’t help but smile at him. “Are you feeling better now?”
He returned a toothy smile that was somehow warm instead of terrifying. “Much better, yes.”
“Good.” I almost stopped there, but I felt compelled to go on. “Look, I know I’ve said I’m sorry. Sorry for what we did to you, sorry for everything you went through. But I want you to know that I mean it. Fuck, more than anything in my life, I wish I could take all of that back.”
Harvey nodded. “I believe you. I’m sorry for your regret and pain. But that pain isn’t the price. Part of the price was what you did in there. Helping me balance things with Rusty. The other part…well, it is up to you if you want to pay it.”
I frowned. “I told you I’ll pay whatever price you think is fair. I know I deserve it.”
The rumble that might have been a chuckle rose in his throat again. “Hear what it is first, then decide.” When I nodded, he went on. “Your sadness and regret are based on what you know. But there is much you do not know. I can show you everything that Rusty did I remember. I can show you what my time in that circle was like. You will know and feel it as profoundly as if it were your own memories, and unlike some memories, these will not fade with age. Or you can choose not to see those things and go your own way.”
I raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean, ‘go my own way’?”
“Tommy, you are my friend. But the love of friendship is a precious thing. It must be paid for just like everything else. If you are willing to see the rest, the whole truth, we will remain friends forever. I will be going back to my land soon, but it may be that our paths would still cross from time to time, and in-between, you will always be in my heart.”
“And if I don’t see the whole truth? If I don’t pay the full price?”
“Then our paths will never cross, and while I’ll still love you, our pact of friendship will be broken.”
My legs trembling, I met his eyes as I stepped forward. “I think I understand. Show me, Harvey.”
I won’t try to describe all the terrible things that he revealed to me. The torture and cruelty he endured. The slow rot of Rusty’s soul as he continued to feed his darker appetites. I saw many, many things, and when it was all over, I lay in a broken heap on the ground weeping. After some time, I felt Harvey’s large hand gently stroking my back.
“You have done well, Tommy. I know it wasn’t easy.”
I looked up at him and smiled. “It wasn’t, but it’s nothing compared to what you went through.”
Harvey sat down next to me and shrugged his large shoulders. “It wasn’t always as bad as that. Where I’m from, there is no such thing as sleep or dreams, at least not as you know them. But while I can’t truly sleep, I can…submerge myself. Live inside myself. It makes it easier to survive. To stay sane.”
I rubbed my face. “So you did that a lot? Stayed inside yourself?”
“Not at first, no. I hoped Rusty would change his mind. Or you might come back. But as time passed, I saw little hope of anything getting better. So I sunk deep inside myself for longer and longer periods.” He sighed. “It was a selfish thing for me to do.”
I frowned. “Why is that selfish? You were being fucking tortured.”
Harvey’s eyes flickered as he looked at me. “You didn’t see any memories of Rusty killing anyone did you? Of him using me to kill anyone?” I shook my head. “That’s because I was buried down during those times. I still did it, and I know I did it, but at the time…well, I can’t dream, but that’s what I imagine having a dream must be like. A nightmare.” He stood up with a soft rustling sound. “I still have my price to pay for that too.” He looked troubled for a moment before offering me a smile. “But that’s for later. For now, I’m glad I had some time with you again.”
I stood up too, a knot growing in my stomach. “It sounds like you’re about to go.”
He nodded. “It’s time. But it may be that we see each other again some day. I really hope that we do.” Before I could say anything else, he reached forward and pulled me into a tight embrace. My feet barely brushed the ground as my face was buried in a soft bed of fragrant, furry moss. I found myself crying again a little as I hugged him back, but I realized I wasn’t really sad any more. Just grateful.
Because I realized that the final price Harvey had asked me to pay hadn’t been a punishment, it had been a gift. It freed me from any guilt about Rusty’s fate, and sharing the burden of Harvey’s pain…rather than making me feel weighted down, it made me feel lighter and happier. Made me hate myself less. Because I had finally stood by my friend after all this time. I had done the right thing for once in my life. And I had helped stop a monster from ever hurting anyone, including me, again.
I gave Harvey another hug as I began to sink back to the ground. He was starting to fade away, and in a matter of moments I was watching as a large leaf devil whirled and danced out of sight. I waved a final time and began walking back toward my car with a smile on my face.
I knew I would miss him in time. I knew I’d miss Rusty as well. But for now, all of that seemed very distant and unimportant compared to the wonderful truth burning in my heart.
---
Credits
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