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Let's Not Meet: Stalker Wife



This happened about 4 years ago.

I had just started working at a university hospital in the US as nursing care tech. At the time, I was planning on going to nursing school (I've since changed my major and graduated), and thought working in a hospital would be a great starting place for experience, and it would get me a better chance at getting into nursing school at that university.

Anyways, I was always a very outgoing and friendly person (I still am) and I am not a stranger to anyone. I had no issues making new friends at my new job. I worked day shift (7a-730p) 3 days a week. Our shifts always overlapped with night shift in order to give a full report to them about the patients they would be caring for that evening. Sometimes I would have to give report to a night shift employee by the name of "Mark." Mark was always funny and outgoing, and we seemed to hit it off pretty well. I was dating someone at the time, and Mark was married, but I always just felt like he was a cool friend to hang out with.

We had previously discussed stories of going out to bars. One night when I was getting off work, I had mentioned I was planning on going out to a bar the next night with a group of friends and invited him along. He was more than happy to join us. The entire time we were out there, we had a great time and he hit it off with everyone there despite not knowing anyone in my friends group. He never blatantly hit on me or gave any once of indication he was attracted to me. I just saw him as a friend and it had always felt that way, and I felt the feeling was mutual with him.

I arrived home around 2 am, and woke up maybe around 9 or 10 am. I checked my phone to find an unreasonable amount of text messages from an unknown number. This was several years ago, and i no longer have the messages, but it was something along the lines of this: "I know you went out with my husband last night. I know you have a boyfriend, but you must be attracted to my husband. Otherwise, why else would you invite him out to a bar without my presence, and without your boyfriend? I know my husband is attractive, and i don't always appreciate him going out with other women..." blah blah blah i don't remember the next 4 paragraphs she sent me, but the one that stuck out, was when she asked, "So... are you a team player? wink emoticon"

I kindly informed her that I do have a trusting boyfriend who did not mind if i went out with male friends, and I was in no way attracted to her husband (he was not attractive whatsoever, but i didn't say that). I also told her that while I understand and respect that they have an open relationship, I am not interested in experimenting with other couples, and I prefer my relationship to be monogamous. She was completely understanding, and even offered to meet up for drinks with her and her husband in the future. Now, I don't care if my new friend is a swinger. Not my personal lifestyle, but hey, I don't judge. I was willing to forget the whole ordeal and look past it. Big mistake.

Myself and Mark made plans to go on a double date with my boyfriend and his wife ("Helen") at a dance club. All was well and we all had a lot of fun bar hopping and dancing. She seemed cool enough, and I learned she was a school teacher in the neighboring town. By the end of the evening, we all had our friendly goodbyes and retreated home.

Again, the next morning, I woke up to a whole new set of a million text messages sent from his wife. This time not so friendly. She was upset and went off on me claiming that I was a home wrecker, and that I had destroyed their marriage. She claimed that I had grabbed his hand on the way to the dance floor and put his hand on my ass (which never happened), then claimed I grabbed his ass (which never happened), then changed her story a third time and claimed i grabbed his ass (which, again, never happened either). I kindly explained to her that none of these event ever occurred.

She said I obviously didn't remember any of it because I was too drunk to remember, and she said my boyfriend had to carry me out of the bar. Now, I had only had 2 drinks over the 3 hours we were out. I was never drunk, or "black out" as she had put it, and I left the bar walking on my own with my boyfriend at the time, and had myself a good nights sleep that night. Either way, she wasn't having my side of the story. I decided to let it go and stop trying to convince her otherwise, and I was planning on having a talk with Mark regarding the misconstrued issue.

The next day, she posted on Facebook about how her marriage was wrecked because of me (she used my name in her Facebook status), and said she was going to show up at my house and settle it. She also said she never slept, and hadn't slept in days and it was all my fault, and she placed the blame for her failing marriage on me. The words she used describing how she was going to "settle" it weren't so kind or mature. She had no idea where I lived so I wasn't too worried about it.

She told everyone (and left me a wonderful voice mail) about how she planned on pressing charges against me for molesting her husband that night. A few hours later she left me another voicemail sobbing and apologizing to me, telling me how horrible Mark was, and how he's a jerk and really mean to her, and told me she was sorry he ever got in the way of our friendship, and she would never allow him to interfere with our friendship ever again. I hardly knew her, and I had only met her once in person! I promptly deleted and blocked her on Facebook, and my boyfriend did as well. I never returned her calls. Nor did I worry about having charges pressed, because that never happened, and her husband had agreed with me prior.

Although I had stopped responding and ceased contact with her, the phone calls started. She would call me all all hours of the day. Anywhere from 6 am - midnight, but i never answered. Any time she was awake. I had no issues leaving my phone on silent so i just ignored them thinking she would give up. She lightened up after a few days.

The next time i was at work, i decided to pull him aside into the storage room to have a talk with him privately because I didn't want coworkers to hear or get involved. I didn't think it was a big issue. I told him the issue i was having with his wife, and he apologized about it and told me he would have a talk with her, and told me he would get her to stop. Great!

Until... he dropped this bombshell that would make all of this make a tad more sense (but still doesn't excuse her behavior). Nearing the end of the conversation, he bluntly told me "Look, Im sorry about everything that has happened with her, but I have to be honest with you... I want to fuck you. I told my wife I wanted to fuck you. She had an affair a few years ago, and recently I've just wanted some strange. She wasn't okay with it at first, but she said if it was a threesome she would be willing to settle with that.
Initially she was alright with it, but as time passed since I told her that, she got upset about it. Sorry she's been so crazy."

I was a little stunned, but it made everything come together a bit about why she's been so upset. I told him i wasn't interested in him, and i also told him I didn't want to go out with him alone anymore, and I didn't want any more double dates, and that was that.

Fast forward a week or so and everything had calmed down. I thought it was over and I was beginning to forget about the whole ordeal. One night I was in bed about to go to sleep, until I got a text message from a number I didn't know. All it says was "what's up? smile emoticon" I asked who it was, and whoever it was completely avoided the question.

"I miss you!"

"Where are you living now? Can I come by?"

"Hey girl, wanna to hang out tonight?"

"We haven't seen each other in forever and it's been too long! Let me come over tonight and let's have a drink and catch up!"

"Im on Winchester road coming into town and I heard you live around here. Where are you? I can stop by on my way into town!"

"Hey girl! I miss you and I love you! xoxo When are we going to see each other?"

I stopped answering because he/she would never tell me who they were. The texting was constant, and the calls were even worse. The calls would come in at 2 am, every 10-15 minutes or so, and they would not stop until about 8 am. This went on for 3-4 days.

Around this same time, my boyfriend got a friend request from someone with no mutual friends, and she had messaged him privately over Facebook along with this request. She explained she was a new nursing student coming to the university we went to, and she was on Facebook to make new friends before she moved here from Indiana, and was researching students at our university in order to make friends before she arrived. He thought it was innocent enough.

My boyfriend was middle-eastern and did not have a common first or last name whatsoever. He also had nothing to do with the College of Nursing at the university. He added her and they had casual conversations over Facebook about similar interests in hobbies, sports, and fun places to go around our town. All was fine and well until she started asking him inappropriate questions like "what's your girlfriend like?" "Do you think im pretty? I think i'm prettier than her!" I don't remember what else she sent him but they eventually turned into sexual advances. My boyfriend wasn't comfortable with it all and considered blocking her, and let me read it because he wasn't sure what to do.

I read through all of the messages, and the first thing out of my mouth was "That's Helen!!" He didn't believe me at first, but the way she described herself and her interests here exactly like her. Once I explained all of this to him, he was convinced. She had made a fake profile with fake friends which she had made in order for it to look real, and used Facebook pictures of one of her relatives.

He confronted her about it, and she completely lost it. She started cursing at him, threatening him, telling him how she has no idea who it is he is talking about, and went on a long rant about how her husband beats her and she's pregnant (i guess for sympathy). Helen was never pregnant and Mark never beat her (as far as I could tell). He told her he was sorry she was in that position and he eventually just gave up and blocked her.
Somehow she managed to get his gmail and university email, and once she found that, the emails started (Keep in mind, I was getting constant phone calls at the same time throughout the nights when this was happening. I mean, i was getting something like 200+ missed calls when I woke up the next morning).

Initially, the emails were threatening, then later moved to emails looking for sympathy for a made up pregnancy and her abusive husband and all of the horrible things he did to her, then finally moved on to a confession about how she really was Helen, and she was sorry. He never responded to any of them. Because he never send a response to her apology email, along came once again another angry, threatening email. He didn't respond to that one either.

At this point, I had had enough and I was just worn out on the entire thing. It became exhausting, and i was so tired of dealing with it. I good friend of mine is an officer in our city, and I called him and told him everything that was happening, and how bad it was escalating. I showed him all of the emails, texts, messages, and phone calls. The first thing he did was call the number who had been harassing me to have them stop. She admitted it was her (Helen), and agreed to stop contact with me, but told my friend ("officer Walton") that she will be pressing charges against me for molestation.

He explained to her that it is not possible, and no such thing as pressing charges for molestation for grabbing a grown man's ass. She was displeased, but I think having an officer call her to cease contact with myself and my boyfriend was enough to make her stop. I never heard from her since.

Months went by and everything finally went back to normal. I had transferred to a different department within the hospital so I would not have to work with Mark anymore. I never told anyone at work about it, but I did not wish to have any more contact with him, but I was still on the same floor despite being on a different unit. I passed through his hall one night leaving work (I had to in order to go home). He was off work that night, but I stopped in the nurses station to say hi and bye to some of the nurses i used to work with. There was a large note hanging in the nurses station with the extension to security. I laughed about it and asked what in the world could have happened to need their extension in such large, bold letters??

"Nadia" told me that apparently Mark had left his wife while she was at work. He packed up all of his belongings and moved to an apartment in town without any notice to her, and he was planning on divorcing her. This did not settle well with Helen. For a few days, she came up to the unit he was working on looking for him in order to confront him about. She only showed up on his off days for a few days until she finally found him. She never told any of the staff who she was. She just kept coming around asking about him. They would just tell her he was off work and she would leave.

After 9 or 10 pm, all visitors have to check in with security with a state-issued ID in order to enter the hospital. Helen had found an old pair of scrubs that belonged to Mark, and when she came up to the entrance, she told security that she had left her badge at home and she wasn't able to access the building because of it. Surprisingly, they just let her in. She went up to the unit he was working at and she began screaming, crying, and begging him to come home. One of the nurses called security because she was making a huge scene. When security arrived to escort her out, she threatened suicide if he didn't come home. She ended up being admitted to the mental facility a few miles down the road. The staff had left a note up in case she showed up looking for him again.

Several months later, he divorced her, graduated from nursing school, and moved back to Indiana once he found a nursing job from his hometown. I never heard from Mark or Helen again.

Fast forward a year, i went out with my friend officer Walton to just hang out and catch up, as we hadn't seen each other in a while. He mentions out of the blue, "You will never, ever guess who left me a voice mail just a few days ago... Helen!" I was dumbfounded. What the hell did she want? She still had her number for over a year? He had only called her once, but I guess she kept it for over a year and a half. He let me listen to the voice mail. She told him she was trying to divorce Mark because he was abusive, and she needed to serve him a restraining order. She told him I was helping her out with it (Fuck no, i was not). She said the courts had told her she needed to find an officer on her own in order to do so. My friend officer Walton never called her back.
He laughed and said that it was highly unlikely she had a restraining order, because once one is in place, the county finds their own employees to take care of the matter. They do not leave it to victims to ask around and find an officer to take care of it for them. Regardless, he never called her back and we never heard from her again. So Helen, please for the love of humanity, let's not meet. I don't want to deal with your shit again.

TL;DR - Made friends with a married guy at work and invited him out. Wife didn't like it and offered a threesome. I declined, and she continued to stalk and harass me over the period of 6 months until she was finally admitted to a mental care facility. My officer friend saved the day.

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