Uncle Teddy and Cora: The Dollhouse (Part 2) [FINALE]

  

Every true practitioner of black magic knows where that road leads, and while they’ll spend a great deal of time, money, and effort learning how to avoid or limit any time in Hell, they get very squeamish when it comes to the details of the place itself.

How it works. Its history and nature. Even obviously useful things like how magic works there or the Realm’s geography.
I first recognized the willful blindness these assholes seem to share a few years ago, and once I did, I saw a small crack I might fit through. I started directing more of my secret efforts to gain occult knowledge toward information on Hell itself, and while it was scarce, it was out there. The stuff didn’t exactly read like a travel guide, and much of it was very odd and obscure, but over time I developed quite a bit of knowledge of the place.

For instance, I think I mentioned before that Hell didn’t start when Lucifer and his angels fell there. It already existed, although it was much different. More importantly though, it was already occupied. The things that were there…well, they were extremely powerful and very old even back then. There was some fighting when the angels arrived, but for the most part they seemed to just…leave. No one is sure where they went other than some oblique references I’ve found that they are still waiting “Outside”. Outside of what, I’m not sure. But that’s less important for our current lesson on our favorite vacation getaway.

I said for the most part they left. There was one that stayed behind and fought to keep Hell. It was apparently the least of these beings, and it still destroyed over half of the forces Lucifer had at his disposal. And when I say destroyed, that’s exactly what I mean.

There’s no death in Hell. Not really. If you die, where else would you go anyway? But the Hunter sends people and demons somewhere, right? I’ve heard his power called “paracausal magic”—magic that is distinct from Infernal or terrestrial magic because it is not bound by the same rules of a particular Realm or our reality. I think this being, this remnant of the old, first Hell, might have had a weaker, less refined version of the same thing. Either way, it took all of Lucifer’s armies to kill it, and even now its body lies at the furthest edge of Hell.

The City, as Christopher called it, is the capital of Hell. It goes by many names, but the City works well enough. It was built initially by Lucifer as a fortification near that leviathan’s corpse—just in case it was only mostly dead and ever woke again. It never has, and the City has continued to grow over time. And not just the City.

Have you ever wondered why the Hunter hasn’t fully taken over Hell after all this time? He’s had hundreds of years, right? Part of it is because Hell truly is vast. The other part is because it keeps getting vastier.

Hell never stops growing. For every mile the Hunter takes, another mile (or maybe two) grow up between him and the edge of Hell. It’s like stretching demonic taffy that never gets thinner or breaks. In theory, that sounds like it might be a good thing. The Hunter is super shitty, and if old Infernal Hell is a slightly less shitty alternative, isn’t it good to keep at least some of it out of the Hunter’s grasp? Well, yes, but the growing is still a big issue. Because of the Breach.

---

“Hang on a minute.”

Teddy raised an eyebrow. “Question?”

We were still in the parlor, Darrow’s mask slowly dripping blood out of the bottom as me and Teddy had story time. It was disconcerting, but I had faith that Teddy knew what he was doing. But all this new information? “Why didn’t you tell me more of this before?”

Teddy sighed. “I was getting to that, but I can jump to that part I guess. I had never actually been to Hell before the time I committed suicide and you brought me back. As you know, part of my reason for going was to get hair from the Hunter for our little dinner party. The other reason was to visit the Libraries of Hell.”

---

There are Six Libraries of Hell, or there were, and they contain the collective knowledge of Hell on many subjects, including various forms of magic. They are, as you might guess, immense, but they have a couple of unique features as well. First, they have magic protecting them that makes it difficult for the Hunter, or anything tainted by paracausal magic, to get near them. That is another reason the Hunter’s progress, while steady, has been slower as he gets closer to the City, as all the Libraries reside there. Second, while time is very different in Hell than it is here, it is almost nonexistent in the Libraries.

During the few days I was dead before you brought me back the first time, I spent what would have likely felt like months or years in Hell. Except I spent over half that time in the Libraries, so those months or years became centuries. I had tried to prepare myself for what that would be like—the loneliness, the strangeness of it all—and there are certain spells that can help cushion the negative effects of that much time alone and help you retain more, but they can only help so much and my knowledge and skills were pretty limited. I won’t dwell on the details, but the short version is it was very hard, but I got through it, left the Library and had my…disagreement with the demon, got the Hunter’s hair, and you brought me back.

The second time I went to Hell was during the big party, and my primary focus then was to find you and stick together until our dolls pulled us back, so no trips to the lieberry. The third time was when I died in Brimley. Back to the Libraries I went. That trip was much more productive because I knew a lot more and had a much better idea of how the Libraries actually work.

Each of the Libraries are different in many ways, but they do share some commonalities. First, you are always alone in them. That’s not to say there aren’t various other beings in the Libraries when you are, but they are usually just shadowy glimpses now and then. It’s like everyone is on their own frequency. It makes things lonelier, but it does make it much safer and easier to focus on learning what you came for.

Second, the Libraries are much bigger on the inside than they are on the outside. Like way bigger. It’s a similar magic to what the Blind Court used in their blood tesseract, though it is much more refined and efficient. It took some time on that first trip, but I managed to learn a janky version of how it worked before you brought me back. More on that later.

Third, the term “library” is kind of stretched to its limits when you’re talking about the Libraries of Hell. Yes, there are endless mazes of books, scrolls, charts, you name it. But there are many other things as well. They are all designed to store and potentially impart knowledge of one sort or another, but the harder stuff…the more valuable stuff…well, it can be tricky and more dangerous to get.

Finally, what I suspected on my first trip and confirmed on my second, is that the most powerful magic and information is split up between the Libraries. You might have a spell or an old history of some important event divided between several or all of the Libraries, meaning you have to visit them all and search out the information. That’s another reason I had to work fast when I went there from Brimley.

On that second trip, I spent a great deal of time at the second and third libraries. Even with magical help and prior experience, I can only find things so fast and remember so much, so my knowledge is very patchy and incomplete. I have learned several things that will help us greatly I think, but I still have much more I need to learn.

---

“Hold up.” I waved my hand to stop Teddy. “So you’re saying we’re still not done with the Libraries? We have to go back to Hell again?”

Teddy frowned slightly. “Well, yes. There are several threads I’m following that might lead to answers for how we can stop the Breach or the Hunter, but I don’t know yet. And while you don’t have to go with me, I won’t deny having your help would be great.”

My heart was hammering in my chest at the thought of going back there, even if it was to a library in the non-Huntery part of Hell. I pointed to Darrow. “But you’ve got enough magic to beat his ass now. No chance of making do with that?” I knew the answer as I said it, but I had to try.

Teddy grinned at me. “I’ve got enough magic and understanding of Christopher to trick his ass so that he beats himself. I don’t know that I would win any kind of wizard duel or whatever Harry Potter gobbledygook you might be imagining.” He ignored my dark look and went on. “The reason we beat him wasn’t because I’m stronger than him. It’s because he walked into a trap. As I said, when I went into the first Library, I made it a point to figure out a method of replicating the way the Library worked. A magical tesseract—a pocket dimension where I set all the rules.”

“Our house…it isn’t the real house. It took weeks after the party, but I magically recreated our house down to the smallest detail and then sat it down on top of the real thing. Anyone who passes through a door or window or any boundary of this place is actually stepping from the real world to our version of the house, though they’d never know the difference unless they were very skilled in magic and looked very closely. The problem for them is, they have to be inside to see it at all, and by that point they are already trapped.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Okay. So I get letting Darrow think he was in control when he first got here, stopping the golems, being a dick, all that. But are you telling me you have a bunch of demons chained up somewhere to power all this?”

Teddy stood up beaming. “That’s the best part. Like I said, the version that I’m using is a janky version of the Libraries’ magical tesseract spell. But it is still way more efficient than the blood tesseract the Blind Court was using. I’ve ran it so far on just a little bit of my own lifeforce now and then. Maybe took of a few months or a couple of years my natural lifespan at most.”

Now I stood up. “Teddy, no. We have to figure out another way…”

He raised a finger. “I already have.” He had reached Darrow’s body and gave the giant doll head a large tap. “This contraption is very interesting. After being applied for a few minutes, it shunts a person’s soul from the brain, which is usually the physical tethering point for one’s spirit, to…well, the torso? I’m not sure if it’s the heart, the colon, or what exactly, but it pushes it down there and preserves the body indefinitely.”

I wasn’t sure I would like the answer, but I asked anyway.
“Preserves it how and for what?”

Teddy’s grin got wider as he thumbed a latch on the bottom of the doll’s head. There was a large metallic clang like a bear trap being sprung, and then the doll’s head rolled off and onto the floor, carrying Darrow’s head with it. I stepped back with a small yelp as Teddy chuckled darkly.

“Darrow doesn’t get to die. I can’t risk him roaming around Hell or coming back here, and he deserves worse than that. And he’s also too dangerous to keep as a prisoner, even in the little dollhouse that I’ve made for us. But it’s his knowledge and intelligence that makes him so deadly. So the doll head’s job was to first give him a magical lobotomy before going to work shoving his dirty soul down his throat and into his pancreas or whatever. Because, at least when it comes to humans, all magical power is stored and channeled through the soul. And even though Christopher’s soul is no doubt a toxic waste dump, it still has a lot of power.”

I nodded, giving Teddy a small smile. “Enough power to be a battery for our new house?”

“Exactly!” He looked pleased for a moment before his eyes fell to the doll’s head on the floor. “That thing just keeps leaking blood. The neck stump is sealed properly, but Chris’ stupid head has really ruined this rug. Oh well.” Suddenly the doll head was gone and the blood-soaked rug was clean. “That’s better.” I was feeling much better about things overall, even with the looming dangers of what was coming and what we still had to do. And I still had a lot of questions, but one stood out to me as the most important.

“So what exactly is the Breach?”

Teddy’s expression darkened, and after a moment’s consideration, he grabbed a piece of burned wood from the fireplace and crouched down. He drew a large circle of ash on the floor and then a smaller one inside it. Looking up at me, he said, “This is a rough approximation of an old cosmological drawing I saw one time from a French occultist named Trudeau or something. I don’t know if it’s right or not, but it will work for our purposes.”

Pointing his stick at the smaller inner circle, he said. “This is us. Our universe, and all the alternate versions of this universe that might exist if you believe that sort of thing.” He pointed to the larger outer circle. “These are the Realms. There are supposedly Seven Realms, and one of them is Hell.” He looked troubled as he waved his stick beyond the circles. “Outside of that…well, no one knows, though some think that’s where the first occupants of Hell went to.”

Moving back to the center circle, he went on. “The more pressing point is this. Hell is not only always growing, it’s growing inward. Meaning it is getting closer and closer to our reality. Now normally it might just reach that boundary and stop…like soap bubbles pressing up against each other. The problem is the edge of Hell has the corpse of some cosmic horror sitting there like a battering ram. A battering ram that is likely still imbued with significant amounts of reality-breaking paracausal magic. Maybe enough to breach the border of our universe and send Hell spilling in.” Standing back up, his face was serious. “So that’s the Breach. And that’s why we have to stop it.”

“Fuck.”

He nodded. “Yes. Fuck.” There was a moment of dour silence between us before his face brightened. “But cheer up. We’re on the right track I think. All we have to…”

“Why did you smell weird when you came back today?”

Teddy gave me a mock offended look. “What did I smell like?”

“Um, smoke and brimstone. I figured that must just be what non-Huntery Hell smells like, but why did you smell at all? Don’t you get a new body when you come back? One that’s never been in Hell at all?”

He nodded. “Normally, yes. But when I went the first time, I had to have a way back with the Hunter’s hair. So before I killed myself, I spent months figuring out not only how to steer where I landed in Hell, but also how to give myself a new physical body there instead of when I got pulled back by the doll. It’s more dangerous, and as you saw, it led to me popping back with injuries from that stupid demon I double-crossed, but it does let you physically bring stuff back with you, which can be very useful.”

His eyes took on a devilish glint as he continued. “As for the smell, normal Hell doesn’t really smell like much of anything, or at least not uniformly. It’s not like an old cartoon full of fire and brimstone, at least not from what I’ve seen. No, the smell came from the first three Libraries. When I was finished this time, I burned all three of them down.”

My eyes widened. “You burned them down? How? Aren’t they super magically protected?”

He smiled. “They are. Super-duper even. But there are always cracks to get through, and I’ve had a lot of time to figure out where they are.”

Shaking my head slowly, I sat back down. “But all that knowledge. There’s more there that could help us, right? Now it’s just gone?”

Teddy came and knelt beside me, his eyes locked on mine. “More that could help our enemies too. They’re terrified of Hell, which is why most of them, even Darrow, haven’t tried to use the Libraries before. But between the Hunter and us, they’re getting more desperate, more dangerous. They can’t be allowed to learn some of the things I’ve learned.” He put his hand on mine and gave it a squeeze. “And don’t fall into the trap of assuming knowledge is always a good thing. That’s their way of thinking. They think that understanding more, becoming more powerful, justifies everything they do. I’m learning what I need to stop them and keep us safe, that’s all. And if you decide to come with me, you have to promise to do the same. It’s a dangerous, slippery road we’re walking, and you know what they say about the road to Hell.”

“It’s super shitty.” I squeezed his hand back and smiled. “I promise. And of course I’m coming with you when you go back.” He stood up, but not before I saw the relief on his face. “That means a lot to me, Cora. And if it’s any consolation, it’ll be a bit before we go back anyway. We need time to rest and recuperate, or as you might say ‘chillax’, and…”

“I would never say ‘chillax’. No one says ‘chillax’.”

He sniffed dismissively as he went on, “and we have several projects to complete before we’re ready to go back. I think it might be a bit rougher going next time. You ready to eat something? I’m fucking starving.”

I swallowed, trying to keep my voice light. “Oh? Rougher? Why’s that?”

Teddy shrugged as he headed toward the kitchen. “Well, the things that run the City? I think when I burned down half of their most valuable resource, I kinda pissed them off.” He paused and glanced back at me. “I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling compelled to eat empanadas.”

Lowering my face into my hands, I nodded bleakly. “Goddamnit. Yes, empanadas do sound really good right now.”

---

Credits

 

Uncle Teddy and Cora: The Dollhouse (Part 1)

  

“So one day Jim Morrison of The Doors died in Paris, and as you’d imagine all of his family and friends were heart-broken, especially his wife.”

“Um, I don’t think Jim Morrison was married when he died.”

Uncle Teddy gave me a withering look of disapproval. “He’s telling a joke, Cora. Don’t be rude.” I glared back at him as I sunk further into my chair with folded arms. I didn’t like the direction this was heading at all. First this asshole shows up, comes in like he owns the place (past magic wards that I thought would have kept him out), and then when I tell Heckle and Jeckle to stop him, he somehow freezes them in place and tells me he’ll kill them if I don’t call them off.

The worst part was, I could tell he wasn’t bluffing. He could do magic in here, and given the fact that he was the person that recruited Teddy into the life of a Dollmaker all those years ago, I thought it was fair to say he wasn’t a good guy. I held out some dim hope that Teddy would come out and fix things with some sinister threat or clever plan, but instead, he had actually seemed happy to see Darrow. They had slapped backs and laughed, Teddy had told the golems to bring us in some drinks and snacks, and now we were apparently sitting down to chit-chat and tell jokes with one of the most dangerous occultists still alive in the world. I kept hoping Teddy was just buying us time until he figured things out, but that hope was fading fast, and I honestly couldn’t tell if my uncle was terrified of the man and just trying to placate him by being pleasant, or worse, he was actually friends with this guy.

With the way he was laughing it up and scolding me when I dared correct the evil fuck, my fear and anger were racing each other for my tongue. I was trying to slow them down, but it was hard, and I knew it was only a matter of time before I was doing more than interrupting his stupid joke.

Darrow cleared his throat as he gave me a dry smile. “As I was saying. So we come to Jim Morrison’s wake, and everyone is there of course. The band is in line to view his body, with the keyboardist at the back. Suddenly, someone pokes him from behind. When he turns around, he sees that it’s God.”

Teddy gave a small chuckle and nod as he listened. I was paying attention, as I couldn’t say for sure that none of this was important, but I felt my impatience growing. If I could just reach my room, I had a gun and…

“God smiles at the keyboardist and says, ‘Hey, man. Sorry for your loss. Jim was a good guy. But given how you just lost your lead singer and all…well, things aren’t looking too bright for the band. What do you say about signing up with me? I’ve got a lot of contacts, as you might imagine, and I guarantee you’ll be happier than you ever were with whoever is managing you now.”

“The keyboardist is kind of shocked by the offer, and he tells God that now isn’t the time or the place for such talk. God looks disappointed but seems to understand.”

“The next day, the keyboardist is sitting in the church during Jim’s funeral. Suddenly, he realizes that God is sitting next to him with a knowing smile. ‘Hey, just wanted to check in with you. I have the contract right here. Higher album percentages, two guaranteed solo albums with backend on any concerts or merch. What do you say?”

“Again, the keyboardist refuses to talk about closing any deal. ‘Later’, he whispers, trying to not be overheard by the rest of the band and poor Jim’s wife. Again, God seems disappointed and leaves.”

“Now we’re at the graveside. Well-wishers and fans are coming by to give their condolences, and the keyboardist sees with some dread that God is in the line and approaching him. Before God can even speak, the keyboardist finally relents—“Fine, fine, I’ll sign with you, okay?”

“God smiles broadly and gives him a hug. “That’s wonderful!” With that, the Almighty pulls out a large straight razor and slashes Jim Morrison’s wife open from top to bottom before leaving the graveyard with a small wave.”

Teddy burst out laughing as I shook my head. “Jesus.”

Darrow looked over at me with a mockingly dour look. “What? Didn’t get it, my dear?”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh, I got it. When God closes a Door, he opens a widow, right?”

The man smiled thinly and nodded. “Just don’t appreciate gallows humor I suppose. Ah well, more’s the…”

I stood up, my fists clenched at my sides. I was trying to give Teddy time to do whatever it was he was going to do, if anything, but I was tired of waiting. Time to tip this douche over a little and see what scuttled out. Some information, a reaction, a mistake, something.

“No, what I don’t appreciate is you walking in like you own the fucking place,” I turned and shot Teddy a look, “through magical wards or shields or whatever that are supposed to keep anyone from coming in or doing magic unless one of us okays it. I know I didn’t okay it. Did you, Teddy?”

Teddy looked at me with wide eyes, his expression both fearful and sheepish. “Cora…I…um…”

Darrow was chuckling again now, but it had lost any pretense of friendliness or warmth. It was a cold, nasty sound that made me suppress a shudder as he stood up and turned to face me. “Don’t blame poor Teddy. His wards work just fine. It’s just…well, who do you think put the wards up for him in the first place, girl?” His eyes twinkled with dark merriment as he took a step toward me. “And who do you think you are to speak to me like this?”

Uncle Teddy stood up hesitantly, his voice trembling slightly. “Christopher, she’s just a girl. She doesn’t understand everything, and she’s been through quite a lot. We both have. Have mercy on her.”

I felt my stomach turn to ice. Teddy really was scared of this man. I had never seen Teddy afraid like this, and it was terrifying. Swallowing thickly, I nodded. “He’s right. I’m just upset. I’m sorry I was rude.” Sitting back down, I kept my eyes lowered. “I hope you accept my apology.”

Out of my peripheral vision I saw Darrow move back to his chair. When he spoke, his tone was slightly warmer. “Good, good. I want my reunion with my friend Teddy to be a happy one. We have much to talk about. You’ve been very busy.” I looked up and saw Darrow had turned his focus back to Teddy now that I had been put in my place. My mind racing, I tried to come up with some way out of this for us, but for now I didn’t know enough to know what might work. For all I knew, Darrow could kill us both with a thought. Or worse.

“Yes, I knew you’d hear about some of that.” Teddy smiled weakly. “But I assure you, it was all self-defense and necessary.”

Darrow let out another small laugh. “Self-defense, eh? The Blind Court, possibly. The caretakers of Die Hungrige Klinge? From what I’ve heard, you sought them out and slaughtered them. But I don’t really care, so we’ll call that a wash. But members of my own Circle? Friends and confidants that I’ve known for decades? For centuries? That’s a different matter entirely. They trusted you, Teddy. I trusted you.”

Teddy frowned slightly. “Didn’t you always tell me that this work you do requires strength of will and mind? Didn’t I do you a favor by getting rid of members that were stupid enough to fall for my tricks?”

Darrow broke into what seemed like a genuine grin. “Teddy, Teddy. You’re right, of course. There wasn’t one in that whole bunch worth as much as you. Most of them would have proven to be more of a liability than an asset in the times that are coming.” His grin began to falter as he went on. “That being said, times are coming. Plans are in motion. Delicate plans that you are disrupting with your chaos.”

When Teddy stayed silent, Darrow continued. “Or do you think I don’t know that you sent the Evening Star to Hell?” He frowned sourly. “That was always Frank’s pet project, not mine, and frankly I think he stands little chance against the Hunter, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t potentially useful as we prepare for the Breach. All you’ve done is sent him to be slaughtered.”

Uncle Teddy went to speak but Darrow waved him quiet again. “I’m not finished. I have given you everything all these many years…kept you safe and protected. My plan was to ensure that you survived the coming change and had a place with me and mine. That may still come to pass, but…well, there’s no easy way to say this.” He turned to stare at me, his stony gaze boring through me as he continued to talk to Teddy. “This girl, this niece of yours, she’s proven to be a bad influence. I don’t know if she’s some reminder of your former life, someone you’ve been trying to impress, or just a general troublemaker, but she has to go. Permanently.”

Teddy let out a long, sad sigh like a balloon losing the last of its air. His voice small and hollow, he whispered, “Go ahead then. Get it over with.”

I had time to feel a rush of pain and sadness that Teddy didn’t even try to defend me before Darrow was standing again. He made several complex gestures with his hands as he stepped forward, his voice sonorous with dark mumblings that seemed to burn the air as he spoke. I had a final thought that I hoped Teddy would be okay and then Darrow slammed his hands together with a finality that sounded like the cracking of the world.

But nothing happened.

Behind him, Teddy was smirking. “What’s the matter, Christopher? Can’t get it up?”

Darrow whirled on him. “What did you do?”

Teddy gestured to the empty chair. “Sit down and I’ll tell you.”

The other man took a threatening step toward my uncle. “You’ll tell me no…” Then he was yanked off his feet and flung into the chair. The chair itself almost tipped over, but was somehow robbed of its backwards momentum and righted at the last moment. Darrow was still sitting in the chair like a pinned bug, his eyes wide and filled with a combination of fear and hate as he glared at Teddy.

My uncle didn’t seem concerned. “I think we’re done with the portion of this encounter where I let you act like a patronizing ass who’s in control of things. As you are starting to figure out, you are in control of very little at this point.”

Darrow looked like he was trying to swallow a particularly unsavory piece of gristle as he cleared his throat and tried to regain his composure. It was disquieting to see how quickly he was able to do so. Within seconds he was smiling a cold smile, and when he spoke, his tone was measured and careful.

“Do you mind telling me how you accomplished all this?”

Teddy’s eyes glittered as he leaned forward in his chair. He looked at Darrow for several seconds before turning to me. “See, Cora, this is the point where he expects the villains, namely us, to explain the inner workings of their plan. Because rest assured, Christopher sees us as the villains in this simply because we are obstacles to what he wants. He wants to kill you because you’re a bad influence on me. And he wants to see if I can be brought in line. If I’ll stay loyal after watching you get sent to Hell for a final time.”

“I’m right here, Teddy. Talk to me.” Darrow’s tone was harsher now, and it looked as though his calm demeanor was beginning to crack.

Ignoring him, Teddy continued. “The problem, my dear niece, is that Christopher is very smart. Maybe not smarter than you, but certainly smarter than me. And he’s proud of that intelligence, particularly when it comes to matters such as this, where intellect and will are of such great importance. He’s so proud, in fact, that he thinks he can’t be beaten. He’s always three steps ahead of everyone else, you see.”

I eyed Darrow warily. “So he’s really powerless here? You’ve really got him for sure?”

Teddy smiled as he sat back in his chair. “Well, it would be a bit of ironic hubris for me to say he’s beaten with 100% certainty after just going into Christopher’s pride being his downfall, but just between you and me…,” He cupped his hand theatrically as he did a loud stage whisper in my direction. “Yeah, he’s super duper fucked.”

I felt relief flowing through me as though a new wellspring had been tapped in my chest. Quick behind it was mild irritation. “Asshole. You could have let me in on the joke. I’ve been freaking out over here.”

Teddy was still smiling as he nodded, but his eyes were harder and more distant now. “I understand, and I hated it. But I didn’t want to risk Christopher catching on until I was ready. Not because it would have made much of a difference in what happens to him, but because it makes a difference to me.” He swung his gaze back to Darrow, and for the first time, I saw open fear on the other man’s face. “You stole so much from me. You all did. Not to mention all the terrible shit you’ve done to other people and the things you still have planned. You’re owed a lot of suffering, and I find it always hurts worse when its unexpected.”

Darrow’s lower lip trembled with some foul mixture of rage, despair, and terror. “How are you doing this?”

Uncle Teddy cocked a thumb at Darrow as he looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “Do you believe this guy? He’s still more concerned about how I did it than what’s going to happen to him. He still thinks he can win this, particularly since he’s been feeding me bad information for so long.” I saw Darrow flinch at that. Teddy noticed it too and let out a little chuckle. “You want to know how smart my buddy Chris is? He’s so smart, so sly and careful, he had incorrect duplicates of various arcane texts created just so he could give them to me. Teach me the wrong way of doing spells and rituals that didn’t relate to my role as a pet Dollmaker.” He raised his hand.

“And it worked for years. A lot of that was my fault, but in my defense, they were masterfully done. The books looked authentic, and he made sure that enough of the information was right, enough of the things in the books would kinda sorta work, that I would think I was learning the real deal, with any problems due to my mistakes rather than flaws in the texts.”

He turned and regarded Darrow again, his expression stony. “But I knew how smart Chris was. He’d made sure I knew over the years. So I decided to get some of my own super-rare occult texts from other sources. I just…well, I just had a hunch.” He smiled thinly. “And what do you know? I knew enough to be able to spot the differences and tell which one was wrong. After that, I’d still thank Mr. Darrow for the light reading, but I knew not to trust anything in the books that I didn’t independently verify. Time-consuming work, but then again, they made sure I had plenty of time by myself for recreational reading.”

I wanted to ask more questions, but I decided to let Teddy talk it out. For one thing, this was a big moment for him—finally getting revenge on the person that brought him into this life. For another, my uncle was kind of terrifying at the moment. I had seen him angry and ruthless before, of course, but this was somehow different. There was a kind of cold rage threaded through his words and gestures that I had only seen glimpses of before now. It was an anger bred from loss and guilt and shame, and it needed to be fed with the suffering of those that wronged him. Judging from what I was seeing, it was very hungry, and I knew it was best to just stay quiet for now.

Darrow wasn’t as smart.

“Congratulations, Teddy. You finally realized you were a fool. It took you long enough. Why don’t you get this all over with? You’re beginning to bore me.” Darrow’s tone was condescending, but I could still see the fear in his eyes. He was trying to goad Teddy into killing him, but he was also terrified of the prospect. Still, if he was so scared of going to Hell, why…

“…do you want to go to Hell all of a sudden? You’ve always been terrified of going before, even with my dolls to guarantee a way back, and it’s reasonable for you to assume I’d do a tainted doll ritual as soon as you were dead to insure memoriam dolls were no longer an option for you. So what’s different now…” Teddy’s mind was on the same track mine was, but I saw he already had the answer. “Unless you either have another way back or you’ve decided to finally sack up and stay in Hell for a bit.”

Now I did speak up. “Why would he want to stay in Hell? Isn’t he afraid of the Hunter getting him?”

Teddy nodded. “Oh yeah, I’m sure he is. But Christopher is a master occultist. I bet he knows that there are ways you can influence where you land in Hell. And not all of Hell is forest, is it, Chris?”

The man’s eyes bulged. “You went to the City?”

Teddy gave him a wide smile, his eyes dangerous. “Oh yes. Nice place. Been several times now. I even got a local library card.”

Darrow’s eyes closed tightly as he began trembling with what I hoped was impotent rage. “You went to the Libraries. Of course. I still don’t see how…but that’s the only thing that makes sense.” He opened his eyes again, his gaze clear and unwavering. “Teddy, you’re right. You’ve beaten me. And yes, I was going to finally go to the Libraries and try to learn all I could before the Breach. But I wanted you to be on my side for all of that. You were useful before as a Dollmaker, but I see now how much I’ve underestimated you. Wronged you.” He nodded toward me. “I also see that young Cora is an asset. It was foolish to threaten her.” Licking his lips, he gave Teddy a nervous smile. “But none of that changes what’s coming. The Breach will occur soon, and if the Hunter still exists when that happens, we are all doomed. Let’s work together. I feel sure we can win if we do.”

Teddy seemed deep in thought as he stood up. “It’s an interesting proposition. I’ll be right back.” He was headed out of the parlor when I called to him.

“What the fuck? You leaving me alone with the evil wizard guy?”

Teddy rolled his eyes. “Just for a minute. I have to get something before I forget.”

I half-expected him to come back in with a weapon of some kind, but instead he was carrying what looked like a large doll’s head. Even from a distance I could tell it resembled Darrow, even if it was twice the size of his actual head. When Teddy was back in the man’s field of vision, Darrow let out a wail.

“Oh, good. So you have some idea of what this is. That cuts down on unnecessary exposition then.” He opened the head along a hidden vertical seam and fitted it down on Darrow’s shoulders. I had time to see four long needles at different points along the interior before he closed the doll head around Darrow’s own with a slightly meaty-sounding snap. The man’s wail turned into a screech that reminded me of a teakettle, boiling on for several seconds before fading away with a wetly terrible final gasp.

Teddy looked up at me, his expression more relaxed. “Well good. That’s done then.”

Standing up, I started pacing. So much had happened in the last half hour that I felt like I was on the verge of having a stroke. “What the fuck? What the fuck with all of this? What is that thing? Didn’t you just kill him and give him what he wants?”

Laughing a little, Teddy raised his hands. “Whoa, whoa. Slow your roll. I guess some explanation is in order.” Glaring at him, I tried to make myself stop walking the room, momentarily contenting myself with fidgeting as I leaned against the wall. “Um yeah. As I said, ‘what the fuck’.”

Teddy nodded. “Fair enough. Okay, so like I said, I’ve known for some time that Darrow was trying to feed my desire to learn more magic with doctored texts. He really did do a good job on them, but I still learned enough that I started picking up on the flaws and cross-checking anything he gave me whenever possible. Yet, for all my years of study, I knew a fraction of what someone like Milly knew, much less one of the really old, powerful Circle leaders like Darrow. One reason for this is because they don’t like to share.”

“But there’s one area that it’s easier to learn about because, ironically enough, most black magicians don’t want to dwell on it more than necessary. That was knowledge of Hell itself.” 

---

Credits

 

Uncle Teddy and Cora: Talking Turkey

  

“Belief is a disease.”

There were murmurs of laughter in the lecture hall, the scattered pockets of filled seats tittering softly before going back to rapt attention. The man on the stage, Dr. Lester Pickett, smiled indulgently at his audience before continuing.

“No, it’s true. Now, some of my colleagues frown upon me saying that. Others try to define it as a necessity, a social mutation or even a mental illness. But I believe it is both simpler and more complex than that. It is a disease.”

He was pacing now, using his microphone like a practiced stage performer, which I supposed he was. He was in his element—dressed in a sharply-tailored brown coat and slacks, speaking in cultured, non-regional tones that barely betrayed hints of his Mississippi backwater roots, he was confident and handsome with just enough sleaze filming the top to make him interesting. Most of the girls and some of the boys in the room looked as though their interest in Dr. Pickett went beyond just his lecturing skills, but who was I to judge? So did mine.

“A disease is defined as a disorder of a system. An abnormality that impairs normal functioning. And that is precisely what belief does. We are, after all, simply animals. And any system of belief that runs contrary to our normal functioning as animals is a disease. Religion? Yes. Morality? Yes. Love? Kindness? Honor? Yes. Yes. Yes.”

There were less titters during his next dramatic pause, and he raked his gaze across the audience with the sinister glee of a magician preparing his next deadly illusion. “Does this shock you? Does this challenge your provincial ideals? Then get ready. Because this semester, this course will delve into the heart of superstition and belief. You will learn about people who believe in magic. Societies and institutions built upon the principles of elevating humankind both mentally, socially, and spiritually. Paradigms of morality and ethics that you have been programmed to accept based upon the lie that we are more than simply meat shot through with electricity and a capacity for self-destruction.”

He smiled broadly, his dark eyes glinting in the recessed lights of the hall. “And at the end of it, if I have done my job well, you will see it all burned to the ground.”

---

“I don’t know why you think I’d be up for killing him.”

Teddy raised an eyebrow at me. “Why not? You’re not going soft on me, are you?”

Rolling my eyes, I went back to scrolling through my tablet distractedly. “’Going soft?’ I regret buying you that bundle of mob movies.” Glancing back up at him, “And to answer your question, no, I’m not going soft. Because I was never…er, hard. Shut up.”

He smirked at me over his glass of dark tea. “Well, we’ll just accept that your version of ‘soft’ has you surviving trips to Hell, murdering people and hellspawn, and the general ‘ending of careers’ as required. Is that fair?”

I let out a groan. “First of all, you need to stay off the internet. Second of all, I haven’t ever murdered anyone. The few times I’ve…had to defend myself…yeah, I did what I needed to do.” I paused before throwing in, “Plus, you’ve killed way more people than I have.”

Teddy sniffed and checked his watch. “Well, that goes without saying. But a great deal of those deaths were with your help, either accidently or on purpose, and given that a great number of those deaths weren’t technically to protect myself or you from some immediate danger…I think I’m going to call a lot of them murders. Which means you are a giant murderer…or, at the very least, very murder-adjacent.”

Glaring at him, I sat down the tablet. “Is there a point to any of this? You still haven’t told me why you think we need to kill him. There are other options.”

Widening his eyes in mock surprise, he leaned forward. “Really, Cora? Like what?”

---

I knocked on the door and waited a few seconds before knocking again. I had seen him go into the building ten minutes ago, and based on his office hours, he should be inside, but…

“Come in.”

Opening the door, I was surprised by how simple the office was. I’d expected the workspace of an anthropology professor to either be filled stacks of books and obscure sculptures or well-decorated with the trappings of professional academia. But this was just a room with a window looking out onto the next building over, a table with two chairs, and a plush sofa where Pickett sat smiling at me. I sat down my backpack at the door and looked at him uncertainly.

“Come in, come in.” He waved me over, gesturing to the sofa while continuing to talk. “Always glad to talk to my newer students. I am correct, aren’t I? Didn’t I see you in my class yesterday?”

Forcing what I hoped was a shy smile, I nodded as I sat down on the far end of the sofa. “Yes sir, I mean, I was in your class yesterday. I was just going to audit it a time or two, but now I think I want to sign up…if there’s still room, of course.”

Pickett shifted towards me a little on the sofa. “I think we can find room for you, sure. I don’t like to turn away inquiring minds, particularly when they belong to young women as striking as you.” He paused, his smile fading a little. “I’m so sorry. I guess that was inappropriate. I hope you didn’t take my compliment the wrong way.”

I glanced away, my skin crawling a little. “No, no. I’m glad you think I’m pretty, Dr. Pickett.”

“Call me Lester, please. I look at my students as being my friends. My peers.”

He was shifting closer again, but he stopped when I looked up and met his gaze. “Okay, Lester.”

“Good. Now…”

“Can I ask you something about your lecture?”

Pickett blinked, a flash of annoyance passing over his face before he smoothed it into what he probably thought was a charming smile. “Of course, my dear.”

“Your theme for the lecture, and I suppose the course, seems to be centered around the negatives of belief. Morality, religions, belief in magic or superstitions, all a waste of time, right?”

I saw his eyes light up as he got ready to launch into a well-worn response that was probably just a more condensed version of the hour lecture I’d had to endure the day before. Teddy would have probably have let him drone on a bit. He’d have thought it was funny. But I wasn’t in the mood and I had places to be. Holding up my hand, I cut him off before he got started.

“It just seems weird coming from you. What I mean is, you are a very active and prolific practitioner of the dark arts, correct? The highest ranking member of your circle and a master of infernal ritual magic, right? You have tons of beliefs and…well, given the state of Hell, you have to rely a lot on faith I’m guessing. So…”

The man’s gaze had turned icy, and for a moment he looked closer to a hundred than in his late thirties. “Who are you?”

When I smiled this time, it was genuine. “My name is Cora Westgate. I think you know my Uncle Teddy.”

He shot to his feet and started backing away, his face taking on a cruel sneer. “The dollmaker’s niece? You’ve just walked into your own death, bitch. I know who you are, but do you know who I am?”

Leaning back, I gave a small shrug. “Well, I know you used to go by Edward Northrum when you lived outside of Tupelo back in the late 1800s. Had a few names since then, but for the last ten you’ve been Lester Pickett. New head of the anthropology department at the university. Oh, and also head of one of the more extreme circles of infernal occultists around.” I gave him a slight smile. “Well, out of those that are left, anyway.”

Pickett snickered. “Cute. You think your threats mean anything? This place is warded and sealed by blood and my will. I can torture you for years in this room and no one will ever know it. I can keep you alive in a world of exquisite…”

“What are the Keys of Undoing for?”

He stopped and stared at me, his mouth drifting open before he closed it with an angry snap. “How the fuck do you know ‘bout that?” His accent was slipping, but he looked too upset to notice. Shaking his head, he started going around to the far side of the table. “No, it doesn’t matter. I have all the time in the world to…”

I stood up. “No, you don’t. Look, we know that there are twelve Keys. We know that you’ve had one of them in your family for the last couple of centuries and that you’ve found two more over the years. But what are they for? From what Teddy’s told me, there’s a lot of speculation and theories, but I’d like to hear what you think they’re for. Humor me.”

Pickett was silent for a moment, just standing there and staring at me. Likely trying to do something magicky. Something low-level probably, as most of his power came from planned rituals and prepared sites, not off-the-cuff displays of force. His expression grew concerned and then fearful as he broke off staring me down and reached under the table. He was looking for the blood page he kept stored there like a pistol under a poker table. Looking for it and realizing it was no longer there.

“Yeah, it’s gone. It’s all gone.”

Pickett visibly paled as he gripped the table’s edge for support. “That’s not possible.”

I gave him a shrug. “Well, according to you, none of this is possible, right?” I stepped closer to the table. “Except we both know different.”

“What do you want? I’ll never tell you…”

“Where the Keys you had are stashed? Don’t worry. Teddy collected those this morning. You’re my part of it.”

Pickett’s chin began to tremble. “Please. Don’t kill me. I can help you. I can tell you things. Tell you how to prepare for what’s coming.”

I shook my head at him. “You don’t get it, do you? We’re what’s coming. When Teddy went to collect the Keys from your little secret hideout, do you know what else he found? Five children, three of them dead. The ones you were still using as your little blood magic batteries? He said they wouldn’t stop screaming. Even after they were safe, it was like they just couldn’t stop.” I reached back and pulled out my pistol. “So no, you don’t get any deals. Any mercy. You just get the Forest. And the Hunter. And whatever comes after he catches you. Good luck with that.”

I pulled the trigger and a thin jet of flame shot out, arcing across the room and barely touching Pickett before setting him fully ablaze. He only flailed around for a few seconds before collapsing to the floor, and after a few more, his screams stopped and the only sounds were the flames eating his body. Teddy had told me that the fire should limit itself to just the man, burning him so completely there would only be ash and a few bits of blackened bone left. It took less than a minute for me to see that my uncle was right.

I went back to where I’d dropped my bookbag and pulled out the portable car vacuum I’d brought along. A few swipes across the thin rug covering the center of the room and Pickett was gone. Just then, my phone buzzed in my pocket, and when I checked, it was Teddy. His text put my stomach in knots.

Teddy: I have a surprise for you! Hurry home when you’re done!

---

“Look, I’m all about Thanksgiving. Good food, lapsing into a coma, feeling shame the next day, I’m down for all of it. And I do love turkey. But I have a strict rule that I don’t meet my meat.” I waved my hand. “Call me hypocritical, I don’t care.”

Teddy looked at me with feigned sincerity. “Hey, judgment-free zone here.” He turned and gestured at the pen Jeckle had brought in a few minutes earlier. “But I must insist you call our guest by his name. Harrison J. Turkey. After you have become more familiar, primarily through digestion, you may refer to him as Harry from time to time.”

The turkey in the pen looked from Teddy to me. It was like he was actually following our conversation. That was dumb, but it did make me even feel worse.

“You are an ass. And I’m going to the store to get some ham and turkey for tomorrow. You should give this poor thing to…a turkey preserve or something.”

Teddy chuckled and drained his glass before looking down at the turkey. “I told you. She’s got a good heart.”. He reached over and unlatched the pen, and after a parting look at Teddy, the bird stepped out of the cage and came over to sit next to me.

“What is this? Did you hypnotize this turkey?” A dark thought occurred to me and I started edging away from the placid-looking bird. “Is this even a turkey at all?”

He grinned. “It is a turkey, though I like where your head is at. But it’s a special turkey. Okay, technically it’s not a turkey. It’s a grimalkin. But it does look like a turkey for now both due to my little prank and well, tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and grimalkins are known to adhere strictly to local customs, whatever they may be.”

I had stood up and was slowly moving away from where the turkey still sat. “Okay. So what’s a grimalkin then?”

Teddy went to drink more tea, saw the glass was empty and sat it back down in irritation. “Technically, a grimalkin is an old term for cats I think? But it’s also what the turkey is. I mean, I think he can be a cat too, if that helps.” The turkey gave a little nod and started melting and reforming before my eyes, feathers being replaced by fur, small dark eyes growing into large yellow ones.

“No, no, that does not help!” Almost instantly the turkey was back. Teddy gave it a long-suffering look. “Sorry, my niece is a bit of a drama queen.”

I stabbed my finger out across the room at Teddy. “No. Don’t put this on me. Tell me what’s going on. Is it dangerous?”

My uncle frowned. “Well Cora, anything in the right circumstances can be…” I glared at him and he trailed off with a pout. “Okay, fine. He’s not dangerous to us. Grimalkins are primarily used as helpers. Familiars, that kind of thing. I’ve entered into an agreement with this one to hang out and help out. He’s very good at sensing ill-will. If anyone is heading this way with trouble, we should get the heads up well ahead of time. According to what I’ve read, at least.”

“In the hell books. The books from the literal library of literal Hell. That’s where you get pet tips.”

The turkey let out an angry gobble as it shot me a dark look. Teddy stood up and cut his hand across his throat while shaking his head. “Ixnay on the petay. He doesn’t like that kind of talk. He’s our guest.”

I raised an eyebrow as I looked questioningly at the turkey who was now grooming his feathers. “So it can talk?”

Teddy gave me a dubious look. “Of course not, Cora. It’s a fucking turkey. Magic or not, we don’t live in a cartoon. Now gather your things so we can be off to the store. All this talk has made me hungry.”

 

---

Credits

Uncle Teddy and Cora: Fucking Brimley

  

When the demon-killing, superhero asshole hit me, it hurt a good bit. Kind of like I would imagine getting shot wearing a bulletproof vest. The fact that it was meant to cave my chest in wasn’t lost on me in retrospect, but the dull, aching shock of concussion and pain distracted me for a moment.

That moment was all he needed to zip over and rip out Cora’s throat.

I felt rage filling me as I saw her gushing body topple to the ground like a lifeless doll. I didn’t have time for that kind of anger now though. While the protections I’d already put in place had cushioned the attack and robbed it of any physical inertia (hence why I was still standing instead flying back like I was in a bad martial arts movie), the attack was only partly physical. If he got his hands on me and went to work, he could very well kill me before I was ready to die.

Raising my hands and trying to force a friendly smile, I called out to him as he rounded on me, his eyes widening when he saw I wasn’t lying in a dead, ruined heap. “Hey, chief. Not a demon. Neither was that girl you just fucking murdered.” I could feel the anger lapping against the boundaries of my control, and I tried to push it down again.

“Bullshit. That’s all this town is. Just a nest of fucking demons.”

Nodding, I tried smiling again. “No argument there. Brimley is a giant shithole. Wall to wall demons running from the new management in Hell. I’m sure you’re doing God’s work with your whole killing spree thing you’ve got going on here.” I gestured to the dead demon he’d killed just moments before. “But we are not demons. We just got here.”

The man stared at me for a moment, seeming to consider my words. “Then why are you here? And how do know about demons and this town and all?”

I puffed out my breath as I weighed both my options and how much truth I should give him. He seemed willing to talk, but that could be a bluff. And I thought I could delay him enough to do what I needed to do, but it would be a near thing. If I could get him to cooperate, or at least not try to murder me for five minutes, that would be better.

So some honesty then. We’ll call it diet honesty. Same great honesty taste, but not so filling.

“Well, we got sent here by a…well, a magic creature is the simple answer. A magic creature that is apparently a giant dick and thought it would be funny to stick us in a place filled with demons. And I know about this stuff because demons and the people they run with have ruined my life since I was around your age. So I know a lot, but believe me, I’m not a fan.”

He frowned at that. “Okay. But if that’s true…if you’re not a demon or at least buddies with them, why can I smell the corruption on you? I can almost see it.”

Ugh. “Well, two reasons. First, like I said, I’ve been dealing with these people for decades, so no doubt, some of their stink has rubbed off on me. Second, I have a variety of things from Hell in my body at the moment, for reasons I don’t have time to explain right now. But again, not your enemy, not a bad guy. Just need to get going so I can save the girl you just killed.”

He raised an eyebrow, looking uncertain. “Save her? What do you mean? She’s dead.”

Gritting my teeth, I started judging the distance to the truck stop as I kept talking. “Look. What’s your name? Mine’s Teddy.”

“Um, Phil.”

“Okay Phil. Good to meet you. That woman you just killed is my niece, Cora. One of the best people I’ve ever known. Because of helping me, if she dies, she goes to Hell. Because of you, that’s exactly where she is right now. With all the demons you just sent back there. And I have to get her out, right now, before something even worse finds her.”

I could see that I was losing him as I talked. Aside from being covered in layers of drying blood, he looked like an average, nice-enough dude. Until his eyes started to flare with whatever weird bloodlust he had going on. I didn’t know exactly what he was, but I had a strong feeling he was what a lot of the Infernals called “Vesper”, their supposed anti-Hunter secret weapon that was going to reclaim Hell for them.

Well it looked like they fucked that one up pretty good.

Still, whatever this guy really was or was headed towards being, he clearly didn’t have a good grasp on much of anything, including his own impulse control. I half-expected him to bolt forward and try to kill me again when I said Cora was in Hell, but either way, I was past wasting time trying to placate Phil the Devil Messiah.

“Korscchulughtap.”

Phil blinked. That was a bad sign already. According to what I read, that should bind someone from moving at all for at least a week. But given how he was shitting on demons like they were portapotties at a chili cookoff, I had to account for the fact that infernal spells might not be as effective against him—even old, powerful stuff like that.

So instead of waiting to see if I had actually bought any real time, I ran my ass off.

When I hit the door to a place called “Hattie’s One-Stop Emporium” (because you want your demon store to be properly folksy), I glanced back and saw that Phil was slowly walking toward me like he was trapped in tar, but he was also speeding up the further he made it. So that was just going to be a problem then. Fair enough.

Going on inside, I scanned the shelves for what I needed. Most of the shelves were filled with odd assortments of crap, but finally I found the hallmark of any good truck stop. A dusty case filled with weird and cheaply-made knives. Busting the glass, I pulled out one that had a crudely-realized snake or eagle or something on one end. It should work okay if it didn’t break going in. Grimacing at the thought, I ran to the men’s bathroom as I heard the front door being pushed open.

I had maybe ten seconds to get this right. Making a cut across my forearm, I sucked in my breath as I used the tip of the blade to slide free a tiny silicone packet holding ten strands of light brown hair.

Cora’s hair.

Winding the strands around the knife, I readied my blade over my heart, hoping I had it in the right spot so it would go between my ribs cleanly. While I had never done this ritual before, I felt pretty sure it would work, at least as far as me and Cora were concerned. As for if I could use it against the homicidal maniac coming to kill me, we would have…

The door began to push open and so I began.

“Hell is a forest deep and dark. Its earth is cold, its trees are stark.” Phil was looking at me now, murder in his eyes as he began to reach out slowly.

“One that I love is in Hell’s embrace,” I pressed the tip of the knife into my chest as I suddenly bolted toward Phil. “so please let me suffer in her place.”

As I hit the surprised man, I jammed the knife in as hard as I could, using my impact against Phil’s chest to finish driving the point home into my heart. The effect was immediate, and as I felt blackness filling my vision, I wrapped my arms around Phil and held on tightly.

“Let’s go for a ride.”

---

One second I was sitting in the house of a very strange demon (who had apparently just been stalling until the demonic lynch mob could reach his door for the fresh meat) and then the next I was lying on a dirty bathroom floor. The demon had given me a blanket, but that was gone now, of course. I was back to being naked and cold again, so yay.

Then I saw Teddy’s body.

There was a knife sticking out of his chest, and most of the skin on his hands and arms was burned to black. Even with all I had been exposed to lately, it was really hard seeing him like that. And I didn’t understand how he had gotten me back this time, as I saw no way he’d have a doll with him. Then it hit me.

I didn’t have a doll to bring him back either.

I checked the bathroom quickly for anything he might have left behind—a clue, instructions, something. But there was nothing that I could find. Finally, I went out into what was apparently the truck-stop I had seen when we first arrived in Brimley. Looking around for people with no luck, I took some odd souvenir clothing from the shelves, money from the cash register, and keys from a purse I found behind the counter. I didn’t like stealing, but I didn’t have time to waste. I needed to get back to Teddy’s house, and judging from the hundred or so bucks I had gotten from the register and purse, I was going to be driving it. And I had no idea where fucking Brimley even was.

---

Driving through the small town was an eerie experience. It felt like being in the aftermath of a horror movie. I would go for a street or two with no sign of anything being wrong, and then I would find the bodies of a couple of boys or an old man scattered across a sidewalk or driveway. I considered going back to my old body for whatever I might have on me, but I doubted it’d be worth it. I had been traveling light except for the tumerin when I went to get Teddy from the Blind Court, and I really didn’t want to run into the thing that killed me again.

So I followed signs until I hit the interstate and then I turned west, going just as fast as possible without running a risk of getting pulled over in a stolen car without a license or anything else. I kept telling myself that Teddy would be fine, but I couldn’t know that. I also had the gnawing fear that whatever he had done to bring me back might have messed things up for him to come back via the dolls, but I tried to push the idea aside. I had no real reason to think that. It was just fear talking.

And I had enough to worry about as it was. My latest journey into Hell worried me. I didn’t understand what that demon was talking about, and I didn’t think I wanted to know. And for all my suspicions that he was just stalling until his demon buddies could come to eat me or poke me with pitchforks or whatever, he had seemed as surprised as I was when they started beating at his door. I would have to ask Teddy about it when there was time.

For now, I pulled up to the house and ran inside, Heckle and Jeckle looking at me with the golem version of surprise and happiness. Not having time for chit chat, I told them to prepare the room for a doll ritual while I went into Teddy’s workshop to get his doll.

Even after all these months, I had never been in his workshop before. Entering it now, I found myself slowing to an awed stop at what I was seeing. First of all, it was way bigger than I expected. So much bigger that I didn’t understand how exactly it even fit in the house at all. Beyond that, while there was a portion of it that was clearly intended for making the dolls, beyond that there were rows and rows of books neatly shelved and organized.

As I drew closer to them, I saw that many of them looked very old and were written in languages that I either didn’t read or had never even seen before. Walking between the bookshelves with amazement, I found myself wondering how much there was that I still didn’t know about my Uncle Teddy. That’s when I saw a short hallway at the back of his secret occult library. It terminated in a simple wooden door, and I was tempted to go and peek inside, but forced myself back to the task at hand. Every second I wasted was leaving Teddy trapped in Hell longer.

Hurrying back to where he had described he kept our most current dolls, I opened a large wooden chest and found what I was looking for. Carrying his doll back to the ritual room, I found that Heckle and Jeckle had everything ready. Two minutes later, the ritual was complete and the doll was burning.

Except it just kept burning. It didn’t disappear, and Teddy didn’t come back. I was far from an expert, but in my experience it happened much faster than that. A feeling of panic growing in my chest, I double-checked that all the steps of the ritual had been done properly. When I confirmed the ritual was right, I started to feel a cold feeling crawl up my spine. Maybe he really had messed up his ability to come back via the dolls with whatever he had done to get me back this last time.

I found myself weighing my options, which I knew were few, and I was already checking my phone for the best directions back to Amerson Park when suddenly Teddy was back. Dropping my phone, I ran up to him with a blanket and gave him a quick hug from behind as he stood up. Looking over his shoulder, he gave me a weary grin.

“I told you, I’m not that kind of uncle.”

Shoving him in the shoulder, I wiped my eyes with relief. “Shut up.”

Teddy headed toward the door to go get dressed when he turned back and looked at me, his face more serious. “Thank you for saving me. Again.”

I shrugged and gave him a smile. “It’s what we do.”

He looked as though he wanted to say more, but finally he nodded and walked out of the room.

My smile faded once he was out of view. Teddy looked okay, but something was still weird. Aside from the abnormal delay in him coming back, he smelled funny. Like sulfur or smoke or something. And when he had looked at me, his eyes were bloodshot. But I didn’t understand why that would be. This physical body should never have been in Hell, and besides, what I had seen of Hell didn’t smell like fire and brimstone anyway.

More questions for Teddy, but there’d be time for that later, after he had changed and had a chance to rest. For now, things were finally…

There was a knock at the door.

I got Jeckle to stand next to it as I looked out the peephole. It was just a plain-looking older man that I didn’t recognize, but that meant very little. I debated waiting until Teddy was back out, but given the golems and the protections on the house, I figured I was safe enough to at least have Jeckle open the door.

“Can I help you?”

The man had looked up as the door had opened, giving me a small smile as he regarded me with cool blue eyes framed by a pair of old-fashioned wire-rimmed glasses. “Hello, Cora.” Without waiting for another word, he stepped across the threshold of the door without being invited or allowed in, which I didn’t think was even possible. “I’m Christopher Darrow, an old friend of your uncle’s. And I think it’s time the three of us had a little chat.” 

---

Credits

 

Uncle Teddy and Cora: Dealing with the Debbil

 

“Do you have somethin’ ta offer?”

I was standing in a bright patch of afternoon sun, but it felt like the whole world was cloudy and gray as I looked at the creature that had asked me the question. It was…Well, I don’t know what it was, really. Just looking at it, I’d describe it as a large homeless man made out of garbage and decay, full of dirt and trash and dead things.

But it was more than that too. Its green eyes of broken glass flashed with intelligence, and when its silver hypodermic teeth parted, the words that slipped between them were rough but knowing. I think it was that dry, almost business-like tone that made looking up at it worse. It drove home the point that I was the interloper here, not it. It knew what was going on, what the rules were, what its role was. I was traveling purely off a combination of Abraham’s shoddy notes, educated guesses, and a determination to not give up on getting Teddy back.

It would have to be enough. Stepping forward, I met its iridescent gaze and nodded. “I see you well, Incarnata, and I am here with both an offer and the fervent hope that a deal can be struck.”

Its large, shifting head returned my nod as it spoke. “Well-spoken. The dealing has begun.”

---

(From the notes of Abraham McMillen-partially paraphrased so they make fucking sense)

Incarnata: The name given to one of the Seven Realms. Also the general name for all beings that originate from there.

The realm Incarnata is a highly dangerous place, and was generally considered riskier to visit than infernal Hell so long as one had an escape route planned from Lucifer's Realm. The Hunter’s invasion and slow conquering of Hell has increased that Realm’s dangerousness greatly, but Incarnata still remains a very dicey proposition as well.

The reason it remains a goal for so many is because of what all it can offer. The Incarnata Realm is one born almost entirely out of belief and willpower, ideas and dreams. While it is highly mutable and wildly unpredictable, there are also many indications that it can be a source of great power and fulfillment.

(Two paragraphs are scratched out here so thoroughly that I couldn’t make out anything other than a handful of words: “tulpa”, “well”, and “Elder” in the first paragraph and “Imago” and “Halloween Room” in the second.)

These incredible displays of power aren’t limited to within their own Realm, however. Many Incarnata settle in our reality or in others. There are accounts of Incarnata living relatively mundane lives on the terrestrial plane, while other stories tell of those that cultivate power through becoming a legend or myth. It’s hard to know what is true and what is bullshit.

But what is known for sure is that some Incarnata are here with a specific job or purpose. They act as ferrymen for people that want to cross from one realm to another. Brokers for certain hard to find objects obtained from places most can’t go. While that all sounds great, the price is usually very high. Unlike demons, an Incarnata isn’t interested in your soul. But they find pleasure and power in acquiring something you value greatly, whatever that may be. Incarnatas are allegedly always truthful, but that doesn’t stop them from being shrewd dealmakers. I’ve heard it said that the only people that deal with Incarnatas are those that want to lose more than they gain. Or as my friend Chester used to say, dealing with an Incarnata is a lot like going to an orgy at a power tool convention. You always get screwed in a weird way and you’ll likely leave without all your parts.

---

I tugged up the shoulder straps of the backpack I was wearing as I considered what I had learned from both Abraham and his notes. The backpack was weighted down with all the tumerin from the devil piggy bank, and I knew that the infernal currency was very valuable in some circles, no pun intended. But looking into the Incarnata’s glittering eyes, I didn’t think money would be of any interest to him.

That opening response to his question about “did I have something to offer” had come from another of Abraham’s notes, and while it seemed to please the creature, I wasn’t sure what the best follow-up was. I didn’t want to offer the wrong thing and piss it off, but I also didn’t want to offer more than needed to get what I wanted. Sensing a growing impatience, I forced myself to begin.

“What do I have that is of value to you?”

The Incarnata shifted slightly on its oozing feet before giving an almost humanlike shrug. “How am I ta know what you got and don’t got? Am I your kin or keeper?”

It was hard to tell, but it sounded irritated now. Its metal teeth rasped together to make a low, unpleasant ringing sound that seemed to echo through the stillness of the abandoned park. For the fiftieth time I wondered if not bringing Heckle and Jeckle with me had been the right call. They were great guards, but I didn't know how their presence might unnecessarily complicate things with the Incarnata—I didn’t need brute force, I needed an agreement. I also needed to approach this differently, and fast. So I tried it from the other end.

“I need you to get my uncle, Theodore Westgate, from the blood tesseract controlled by the Blind Court. I will pay…what is fair and reasonable for that.”

A dry, rustling sound that I took as laughter issued from the creature. “Ain’t dealin’ with him. Dealing with you, ain’t I? So if you need travelin’ it’ll be you that does it.”

I nodded, my heart sinking slightly that the simple, easy way wasn’t going to work. “Can you get me to where Uncle Teddy is and bring us both back out of there once I find him?”

There was a pause before he nodded. “I suppose so—if you’re touching when I bring you back. But I can’t see well in that place, so the return will be at a set time, not whenever you like.” He sent out a green tendril of tongue that looked like a slimy, dying vine, its multitude of pulsating branches caressing the spaces between those needle teeth before retreating back into the dark, rotten muck inside. “But what do you have ta offer for such as that? Travels such as these aren’t undertaken lightly or without great expense.” It teased out the last words as though it savored the taste of them, and I felt my heart thudding faster as I realized I was no closer to knowing what I should offer.

Sucking in a breath, I tried to feel my way forward. “I don’t know much about you, but I think I’m right that you don’t care anything about money or mundane wealth. Maybe even offering such as that would be an insult.”

The Incarnata’s eyes flashed with an inner light that made my chest tighten with fear. “You would be correct. On both counts.”

I could feel myself on the edge. If I didn’t give a satisfactory response now, I thought the dealing might be over, and it seemed unlikely that would go well for me. My mind raced back over what I had learned from Abraham about Incarnata and what the creature had said and done. Maybe somewhere in there…

“My family.” I blurted out. “My parents. They’re both dead now, and the memory of them is all I have left. I loved them very much.” I felt tears springing to my eyes, the enormity of what I was about to offer settling on my heart like a weighted shroud. “I offer my memories of my mother and father to you in exchange for safe passage to where my uncle Teddy is located, as well as safe passage back to this world fifteen minutes later for both of us.”

The creature raised a single finger that seemed comprised of a candy bar wrapper intertwined with black clay and crawling beetles. “If you are touching him when I return you to this world.”

I nodded. “Yes. If I am touching him when you go to return us to this world.”

Giving me a gruesome, silvery smile, he took a step forward. “The deal is struck.” Without warning, his hand shot forward and gripped my head, the feeling of cold, squirming earth against my forehead pushing an involuntary gasp from my mouth a moment before my jaws clenched tight. I felt him in my head, pillaging quickly but roughly as he looked for the memories of my parents. Within a few seconds, I felt a terrible coolness seeping through my brain as something precious was taken from me. I was crying freely now, because while I knew I’d had parents and remembered my deal with the Incarnata a moment before, I couldn’t call up any specific memory of either of my parents any more. They were just gone.

The Incarnata released my head and I stepped back, cradling my face in my hands. I was sobbing quietly enough that I could still hear a soft popping sound to my left as something in the park changed. Looking up, I saw there was now a small wooden door standing freely a few feet away. I glanced back at the creature and it nodded.

“Fairly paid. Now go. You have fifteen minutes.”

---

My negotiations with the Blind Court had broken down fairly quickly. They were unable to do more than contain me and offer mild irritations because of the tumerin under my skin, and I was going to give Cora a bit more time before I went to Plan B. So what I was left with was temporary exile to a bare white room that was completely empty except for an uncomfortable recliner that squeaked shrilly at every movement.

The great Blind Court had decided they would force my compliance through boredom.

It wasn’t a terrible plan. Their thought was that being trapped here with them, I’d eventually give in and work with them when I saw the alternative was an eternity of mind-numbing blahness. I would like to say I could just last forever in some zen-like state of internal peace, but fuck that. And besides, my DVR only holds so much. Papa needs to get home.

Still, I tried to be patient. Cora would likely come through, and Plan B wasn’t a good option unless there was no other option. So I just had to get my mind on something…

“Teddy!”

I turned around in the chair as it let out a terrible squeal. Cora was in the room with me, looking a strange combination of ecstatic, sad, and terrified. She also had a gross glob of mud or dog shit or something on her head. I bore it in mind as I jumped up and went to give her a hug, carefully avoiding the earthworm that was delicately exploring her bangs.

“Who has the best niece? I do!” Pulling back, I looked at her more seriously. “Are you okay? Did you have any problems getting here?”

She let out a tired laugh as she picked the worm from her hair and flung it toward the chair. “You could say that. But I made it. And we’re getting pulled back out in less than fifteen minutes, so we have to be in physical contact when that happens.”

I frowned at her. “Fifteen minutes? From when?”

“About thirty seconds ago, I think. The Incarnata didn’t have a stopwatch or anything.”

I felt my skin go cold. “Incarnata? So you wound up having to deal with one? Abraham didn’t have another way?”

She shook her head. “If he did, he didn’t tell me before Milly’s brother, Peter, showed up and killed him.”

I frowned and wanted to ask more questions about that, but it would have to wait. “Did it say if it was fifteen minutes on the terrestrial plane or here?”

A new look of worry spread across her face. “Oh God. I don’t know. It all happened fast and I forgot to ask. Is time a lot different here?”

I raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know. How long have I been gone?”

“Um, about six weeks.”

Rubbing my chin, I nodded thoughtfully. “It’s as I feared then. Time is much slower here, as I have been here for twenty-five years by my best estimate.”

Cora's eyes widened as she took a step back. “So we might be here for weeks or months?”

Grinning at her, I shook my head. “Nah, just fucking with you. I think time is the same now. Used to be different maybe, but my devil coins have been messing with their mojo a bit.” I ducked out of the way as she swung at me, but I was too slow. Pain exploded in my ear as I backed away. “Shit! Sorry! Sorry! Truce!” Holding up my hands, I looked up and saw her smiling at me.

“I’m glad I found you, asshole.”

I gave her another quick hug, blinking quickly until my vision wasn’t so watery. “Me too, Cora. It means more to me than you know.” Pulling away again, I frowned at her. “And I want to talk more about your dealings with that Incarnata. But for now, there’s no time. Did you bring the tumerin from the piggy bank?”

She slung the backpack off into my arms and I grunted at the weight. “Good job. This should work.”

Cora raised an eyebrow. “What are they for exactly? I mean how do they help us here? Just destabilize the place? We’re going to be leaving soon anyway.”

I grabbed the backpack by the shoulder straps and swung it like an oversized mace at the closest blank wall. The bag tore the wall apart like tissue paper. Pointing at the hole, I explained. “This many tumerin can do a lot more than just keep them from directly fucking with us or make their blood tesseract rumbly in its tumbly. We can shatter constructs like this wall, for instance.” Glancing out, I saw the hole opened out onto a dark hallway. Beckoning for her to follow, I went on. “It also expands the range that their magic won’t work on us, making it difficult for them to trick us or keep us lost or trapped.”

We were walking down the hall now, and I stopped at a door marked “Boiler Room”. I pointed at the sign. “Now I would lay money that either one of these dweebs is a Freddy Kruger fan or…wait, they didn’t even have boiler rooms when these fossils were making this place. Freddy fan it is.” I paused, the corners of my mouth drooping a little. “See? That makes me a bit sad. I feel like with more time, we could have found understanding by bonding over our mutual love of Robert Englund’s body of work.” I sighed. “But such is life. Now let’s go free the demons so they can murder these douchebags.”

---

The scary boiler room is a common horror movie trope, and with good reason. It’s dark, confusing, and full of hot pipes and eerie noises. Just kind of naturally unsettling. But you know what is more unsettling? A giant stone basement filled with chained up demons.

I had only seen true demons once before, and that was in Hell when I was running from the Hunter. I had been terrified then too, but the sad sack demons (horrifying as they were) that I saw there were really just another line item on my fear to-do-list at the time. Now though, they had my full attention.

There were small demons, large demons. Some looked human or at least humanish, while others looked like a snake and a spider had a baby with taffy. And not normal taffy either, but very evil taffy. I had expected them to talk to us, or scream threats, or maybe howl like a monster. Instead, they all sat silently staring at us as we entered, each one of them bound by silver chains and secured to devices that bled them endlessly, sending channels of black blood away into small holes in the basement walls. Suppressing a shiver, I leaned toward Teddy.

“I think I know what you’re planning, but are you sure it’s a good idea?”

He turned and looked at me with a smile, but his eyes were hard. “A good idea? That’s debatable. But they fucked with us. People don’t get to fuck with us and live.” He tipped me a wink. “Got to keep up our rep and all.” He turned back to the demon horde chained up before us. The closest one looked kind of like a giant beagle except more…runny. “And besides, these guys aren’t dumb. They know who put them here, and they know they have to work fast once they’re free to get the Blind Court before they skitter away. Right guys?”

In creepy unison, they all gave a single curt nod.

“Cool beans.” With that, he unzipped the backpack and started tossing out tumerin like chicken feed as we walked down the center of the long, dark room. I was very aware of keeping my hand on his shoulder just in case we got pulled back early, but I couldn’t help but watch as the demons began scrabbling for the coins they could reach. With each one they touched, you could almost see them regaining their strength, and by the time we reached the far end of the room, I was already hearing the first of the chains snap.

I put my back to the far wall, half-expecting that the demons were going to turn on us instead of heading for the exit. But for the most part, they didn't even spare us a backward glance. The one exception was a smaller demon that looked like a badly burned child. It took a tentative step towards us, but then stopped. Eyes widening, it spun around and ran after the rest.

I looked at Teddy. “What was that about?”

He shrugged. “Demons are notorious for being…”

There was a disorienting rush of images and suddenly we were back in our world.

“…weird fuckers.” Teddy finished. Glancing around, he gave a frown. “Where are we?”

I was taking in our surroundings as well, and while I wasn’t sure, I thought I recognized the truck stop down the street. “I think we're in a town called Brimley.”

Teddy was about to ask something else when we saw a man chasing a woman down the street. They were both moving very fast, but he was clearly faster, and as we watched, he slammed into her back and sent her skidding twenty feet across the asphalt before she came to a bloody halt.

“Why are you doing thif, Evening tar? We wanted you to lead uf all to the new glory! But you're no different than him! You're just another forry excuse of a Debbil….” The words came out loose and half-formed from her bloody lips, ending in a wet, barely articulated whine as the man stomped on her head hard enough to sent a thick, red spray across the street in our direction. That's when he looked up and saw us.

“More? How many demons are there in this town?” The man was already stalking towards us when I heard Teddy let out a groan.

“Fuck. Fucking Brimley.” I glanced his way, but he was already stepping forward, putting himself between me and the man. “Look, we're not demons and we have no…”

The man was suddenly a blur, moving past Teddy and then to me. I felt a flash of pain followed by rocky ground biting into my bare skin. Because I was naked.

I looked around, suppressing a shiver as the icy air of my new surroundings soaked into me. I was in the middle of freezing darkness punctuated by the stark forests of the new Hell.

“Oh no.” 

---

Credits

 

Uncle Teddy and Cora: The Devil’s Viewfinder

  

Imagine two 18-wheelers carrying full loads of toxic waste. They are at opposite ends of a two mile stretch of road, barreling towards each other as their engines whine and their wheels smoke in protest. Imagine them plunging headfirst toward each other, only the destruction of the other on their cold, metal minds.

Now imagine you are sitting on a raggedy couch between them.

The thing about magic is that it is entirely different than what you see in the movies or on t.v. Instead of lightning bolts and fireballs, you get a dead, unnatural silence that reminds me of the minutes before a sudden and terrible storm begins to roll in. Rather than glowing wizard staffs and billows of smoke, you get an oily residue that suffuses the air as it thickens with something malignant and wrong. That silence? That icky dirty feeling that makes your skin crawl and your teeth feel too big for your head? That’s two opposing wills fueled by years of ritual, discipline and dealings with inhuman creatures. They’re revving their engines and peeling their tires as they slam against each other, and you can sense it, but you can’t see it.

Instead, you see the monstrosity known as Peter staring down at the man known as Abraham McMillen. And if not for the weight of power you can feel burning through the oxygen in the room, it might look like the world’s most intense staring contest. It might even be funny.

But then Abraham’s eyes burst and he starts to scream.

Peter may not have been a match for his sister Dilly or her friend Milly in the magic department, but it was clear he was no slouch. He had managed to follow me here and eavesdrop on my conversation with Abraham McMillen without detection, and whatever Abraham’s knowledge and abilities, I could somehow sense that the thirty second invisible war between them wasn’t going his way. That’s why I ignored the itching sensation growing on my chest and eased the stun gun out of my jacket pocket, holding it ready as a last resort. I had little doubt Peter could rip me apart if I caught his attention too much, but if Abraham lost, I wasn’t going down without a fight.

The problem with Peter, well…the relevant problem with Peter, at least…was that he was a sadist. When he had Abraham on the ropes, wailing and thrashing as his head started to cave in, he kept drinking it in, a twisted smile writhing contentedly on his ruined face like a snake trying to get comfortable on a sunny rock. So during the three seconds he was delighting in painfully killing the other occultist in the room, I jammed a lighting bolt into his weirdly spongey ribs.

He collapsed immediately, but I knew my time was limited. I had pulled the stun gun because I needed him to be instantly incapacitated. If he had time to speak or gesture after being shot or stabbed, I was most likely fucked. But the stun gun bought me a window, however short.

Still, I felt my heart thudding as I heard him trying to say something as he toppled to the ground. He wasn’t even entirely human any more, so who knew how well electricity would even work on him? But rather than a spell, it sounded like he was trying to threaten or mock me.

“You…should…have killed me.”

I was fully on my feet now, my other hand holding the small semi-automatic that I had tucked into my belt before coming to see Abraham. I could hear honest confusion in my voice as I leveled the gun at Peter before emptying it into his chest.

“Well yeah, of course. That’s what I’m doing.”

His body jumped from the impact of the bullets, and as I reached the end of the magazine I moved up to his head. He was still by the time I fired the last round, but I didn’t want to take any chances. Looking back at Abraham, it was clear he was already dead, so I decided to see if a hunch I had was right.

“Heckle, come in here.”

There was a loud crack as Heckle broke open the door and entered the room. When Abraham was alive, there were wards in place that kept most people out unless he invited them in, Peter obviously not included. Now that he was dead, however, his magics were gone too.

“Are you all right?” Heckle’s voice was deep and gravelly, and while his face remained a relative blank, his tone actually seemed concerned.

I nodded and gave him a shaky smile. “Yeah. Just make sure this fucker is dead. Tear him up and watch both of them while I look for anything of use. We have to burn this place when we go.”

Heckle nodded silently as he bent down and began casually dismembering Peter’s body with his bare hands. Feeling my stomach turn over, I starting searching for anything of use in the apartment, including on Abraham’s ruined corpse. Tucked away in an old notebook I found the address for a pawn shop and a note that said “Izu or Franklin Box of Shadows?”, so I figured that was a good place to start. But I also needed to know where to find an Incarnata after finding the box. I searched for twenty minutes, my ears pricked for the sound of approaching sirens the entire time. But there was nothing. Finally giving up, I grabbed an armful of what looked like the most important books and papers Abraham had in his collection and handed it to Heckle.

I had run across a small bottle of lighter fluid under the kitchen sink and now I squirted it around the room, liberally dousing the two dead men before wiping off the gun and placing it in Abraham’s hand. I knew it was sloppy, but I hoped the impending fire would make up for our lack of finesse. Striking a long kitchen match, I tossed it onto one of Teddy’s only friends, if you could call him that. Within moments the living room was fully ablaze and we were heading down the back stairs and calling Jeckle to pick us up as sirens finally began to wail into earshot.

I breathed a sigh of relief. If I hadn’t seen a sign of police coming by the time we reached the car, I was going to have to call it in myself. I didn’t want to risk someone else getting hurt if the fire spread beyond Abraham’s apartment, but it was better that I didn’t have to be the one to make the call. As we got in, I glanced at Jeckle and he just nodded to me, his eyes placid. I’m not sure, but I think the two of them may have some kind of telepathic link. If I’m right, I guess he already knew everything that had happened anyway. Either way, my two magpie golems left me alone as I looked out at the passing scenery, my hands shaking as I tried not to cry.

---

“Hello? Is this Mr. Saltzmann?”

I felt my stomach fluttering as I waited for his reply. In the past few hours I had learned that the woman who potentially had a box of shadows had died and that her niece had inherited her pawn shop. I then found out that the niece had died too. My last hope was the niece’s husband, and his voice was strange when he finally answered.

“Yes. I guess.”

So far so good, even though he sounded like he was either stoned or had just been in a bad car accident. “Hi there. My name is Cora Westgate. I’ve been trying to track you down. Or at least something I think you have.” I sat there, waiting for a response, but no dice. “It’s a box. It’s called an…Izu Box of Shadows, I think?”

Another pause, and I almost threw out “Franklin Box of Shadows” as an alternative, but then he was speaking again.

“Why do you want it?”

I felt a surge of relief. “So you do have it. Awesome. Look, my uncle…he’s been abducted. By very bad people. And I think the box can help me find him. I know that sounds crazy, but if…”

“Fine.”

Something in the back of my head warned this was coming way too easy, but I didn’t have the luxury of questioning it. Every minute I wasted was longer that Teddy was stuck in…well, I wasn’t sure what, but I doubted it was good. “Oh, wow. Great! Look, I have your address and I can be there in two hours if that’s okay. I’ll be glad to pay you well for it but…”

“No, I won’t be here when you get here. Just take it.”

I went to thank him, and to ask if he was okay. He just sounded so…lost. But the line was already dead. I reached his house in the middle of the night, and when I knocked, the door just swung open. As I entered I could smell the sharp copper scent of blood in the air. Pausing at the threshold, I poked my head in further and saw where the smell was coming from. There were two dead men and a dead woman in the living room. It was hard to tell, but it seemed like one of the men had killed the others with a knife before turning it on himself. But before that, he had written a letter.

It was sitting on top of the box in the center of the room, the yellow paper stiff in spots with freshly dried blood. The box itself was pristine and beautiful in a vaguely sinister way, with its black wood and smoky gray metal seeming to radiate a mild inner warmth. I saw a central metal cylinder in the middle of the contraption and what appeared to be small slots on each of its six sides. Leaving the box alone for the moment, I turned back to the yellow paper. It was a letter to me, at least mostly. It warned me to leave the box alone, or destroy it if I could. I guess it was the last thing he did before he killed himself.

I hesitated after reading it. I had little doubt the box was responsible or at least connected to all the death laying around me, and I could feel the weight of Saltzmann’s words. Words he had spent his last living moments writing in an attempt to keep me from repeating his own mistakes. Warning me that the box wanted me to take it. That it knew that I would, despite his plea.

The thing was, I had no other options to help Teddy. I felt like I was on a massive game board, jumping my piece from square to square as I worked my way toward wherever Teddy was being held. Find the devil pig. Talk to Abraham. Find the evil box that probably killed these people. Every step brought me closer to getting Teddy back in theory, but I had no real way of knowing if I was making progress. All I could do was keep pushing on until I got him back or knew that I couldn’t.

But if I failed, it wasn’t going to be because I gave up or chickened out. I touched the tumerin around my neck as I approached the box again. I had started wearing it most of the time since Teddy was taken despite his prior warnings of the dangers it could pose. It had protected me before, and besides, Teddy had given it to me. It made me feel a bit like he was with me.

I found another note discarded on the floor near the box and picked it up. It was instructions on how to use the box. Following the instructions, I removed the collection of possessions already in the central chamber and placed a silver ring my mother had given me inside. Then I spun the tube and looked through the closest slot, holding the idea of finding Teddy firmly in my mind.

The sensation of being somewhere else overtook me immediately. I heard a hushed voice whispering to me in some unknown language, its words feeling like worms trying to eat their way deep into my brain. At the same time, I was seeing…or being transported to…several different scenes.

The first was a small town I didn’t recognize. I didn’t see any people, but in the distance I saw a sign that read “Welcome to Brimley!” I took a few steps toward what looked like a nearby truck stop, but then I was gone. Now I was in the forests of Hell. I couldn’t be sure, but I thought it was near where I had last left it, the same waterfall faintly audible over the buzzing voice pressing ever closer to me. I felt a surge of fear. Viewing something through the box was akin to being in a dream that you only partially realize is a dream. The reality of what I was seeing was constantly warring with my dim recognition of the fact that I was actually in that poor man’s living room and not running my hand over the rough and icy bark of one of the skeletal trees filling my vision.

Then I was in a new place. This was a courtyard of some kind, though it had the feeling of something that was staged to invoke awe and fear more than something that was used for more…courtyardy things. I don’t really know what you do in a courtyard, but you get my drift. It was weird and creepy, but also somehow phony feeling. And I wasn’t sure how any of this was getting me closer to…

“Teddy!” I blurted it out before I could stop myself. Further down the courtyard there were a group of figures seated on stone chairs, but standing a bit closer I could make out the back of my uncle. I tried to run to him in my vison form, knowing in the back of my head that it wouldn’t work, and while I did seem to travel toward him, I was suddenly somewhere else again.

It was a rundown park of some kind in what looked like a shabby part of a normal city. I was disappointed I had lost sight of Teddy, but I could tell this place was important. It was where I needed to go next. The voice in my head was almost unbearable now, but I forced myself to focus as I looked around for any clues as to where I was at or what this place was called. After a moment I saw a small rusty sign dangling from the side of a lopsided chain link fence. I was trying to read it when I felt my chest grow hot and itchy where the tumerin was resting. Then everything faded away and I found myself back in the blood-soaked living room.

I was frustrated, but I couldn’t help but feel relief when I realized the voice was gone too. Touching the coin around my neck, I could tell it was still warm. Maybe it had protected me from the box after all. Either way, I needed to get the thing loaded in my car and get going. Standing up shakily, I said the name that had been on the rusty sign, testing it on my tongue to make sure it sounded right and was seated firmly in my memory.

“Amerson Park.”

I’m not sure what’s waiting for me there, but I have a feeling it’s nothing good. 

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Credits