In my younger days, I was always a fan of cartoons. I still watch them to an extent nowadays, I admit. My favorite genre was varied, but I always had a soft spot for the slapstick humor found on networks like Nick and Cartoon Network. One of the best ones I've seen and enjoyed was a little show by the name of Ed Edd n' Eddy. I loved almost everything about it. The premise, the characters both major and minor, the art style, and the humor of everyone being smacked around like nothing happened at all. I don't think I've missed a single episode of it. When I was around 13 or 14, my younger brother and I had always watched the show every time it aired. After a while, we came up with the idea of recording some of the episodes on a blank VHS tape. Now when we needed something to watch when nothing was on, we'd put in the tape and let the Eds entertain our short attention spans. We'd keep recording episodes for as long as the tape could hold, and you can bet it had gotten its fair share of use by us. We even wrote (in crayon) the show's name and our own names on the labels of the tape.
Now several years have flown over us, we've grown a bit and the tape has been lost for lord knows how long. We'd still catch an episode or two if we were bored and channel surfing. These days I'm either doing something online or just playing games, minding a house and grandparents, it's an interesting life. One fateful day I had gone for a visit to the old family house to see the peanut gang. My brother and I were busy trying to kill each other in the video game Scott Pilgrim when he had taken a bathroom break. Bored half to death, I had opted to wander the house and look through old cabinets and drawers. As luck would have it, after digging through old Pokemon and Power Ranger VHS tapes, there was our old makeshift Ed tape. To say I was happy was an understatement. I had just found something of my childhood that one could call our first project for stupidity. At the end of the day, I took it back home and set it aside. Unfortunately we had no VHS player with us at the time, since DVD and Blu-Ray have abducted them all back to the big tape player in the sky. So instead I had just left it alone on the dresser for another year. Sometime in the new year, as I was setting boxes from the recent Christmas in the back room, I found a bundle of old technology just gathering dust. An old Nintendo, a CPU that I'm sure was running below Windows 98 if such a thing existed, and lo and behold an old VHS cassette player. Now right off the bat, I completely forgot about why I wanted this in the first place and left it alone, but after seeing the tape still dusting on my dresser, I dashed right back to pick it up. So you can guess what happened next. Episode after episode I smirked and watched the memories flood.
The quality was a bit horrid, but I just ignored it. It was pretty normal as far as old recorded VHS could go I guessed. I just sat back and enjoyed the shows. I was happy with myself, I could name each episode before the title card swung by. However one episode started a bit differently, as the title card didn't play after the opening sequence. It just dove into the episode without a word, which from the start I could recognize as "A Twist of Ed". The episode played as usual, Edd was his normal happy somewhat self as he cleaned the table and continued to name off the things he 're-whatevered'. Right after he finished, the screen flickered and the color was in black and white for a second or two. It was back to normal again soon and Edd was running off to pick up the lipstick as the episode was meant to do. But he didn't. Instead he did his usual run over to it and lifted up nothing. The lipstick was gone. Edd's animation still played as if he was holding it, yet his dialogue conveniently omitted the words 'lipstick dispenser, in my back yard'. His animation clearly had him speaking the lines, but instead a low droning sound played as he spoke. This continued up until he was looking around nervously.
At this point, I was waiting for the scene to play out. Marie Kanker was supposed to launch out and attack Edd, but instead the screen dimmed and returned to black and white. Edd wasn't moving anymore, and instead was frozen still. Not even the usual movement of the outlines. The brightness was flickering as the droning and crackling of the audio somehow got louder. And louder it remained as Edd's next line nearly broke my eardrums. "NO PLEASE YOU WOULDN'T DARE" I tried to lower the volume with the remote, but it didn't operate at all. Which considering the remote was working just fine to turn it on and fast forward a little while ago, was more than unusual. I tried to fast forward, rewind, stop, everything I tried had no effect on the remote. Finally the scene began to play again, I saw lovable Ed overfilling his cereal bowl as was meant to be. At this point the remote seemed to be functioning well again, I could change the volume as well as stop it if I wanted to. I let my heartbeat settle down as I hit play and let it continue on. The episode played without a hitch as Edd was running to hide in the van in the junkyard with the other two. They exchanged their issues and Edd shouted at Eddy's stench.
Oddly enough, although it was correctly used, Edd's dialogue always sounded.. off.. It wasn't as loud nor as energetic as he should've sounded, and strangely enough his colors were washing out and faded. Other than that, everything looked and worked well enough. The scene slowly stuttered and flickered again however as Edd got into the back of the van to lay and ponder. He was again motionless and the screen seemed to dim as he folded his arms and laid still. Eddy and Ed were still going on as usual, repeatedly chanting 'THINK THINK THINK THINK'. The volume again peaked and cracked over the speakers, as their chanting started to really get skewered. The sound was hard to describe, but at best it sounded like the words were being screamed by someone who was in severe pain. Edd himself was silent, only the low droning from before playing out as the scene had focused on him struggling to think. Ed slammed on the horn as the scene originally did, but the horn did not sound at all. The only sound it gave out was a strange and sickening crunch. The incredible volume was unbearable now, the remote again rendered useless. I had enough and stood to just shut it off myself.
However before I could, the screen fell into pitch black as yet another scream from Edd echoed out painfully loud. "HELP ME" I stood frozen, my hand already extended to shut it off and everything. The episode continued on and seemed to skip ahead as now I was watching the Kankers walk around a goofy smiling Ed. I just stayed up and watched.I was curious now, and it was obvious something was off. For one thing, it was strange how these errors are completely gone from the rest of the tape since the episodes prior to this one was completely clean. No bugs or volume changes, no different brightness problems, nothing at all. As the scene panned to focus on Edd and Eddy in the tree, concerned about Edd's plan to use reverse psychology, there was a serious issue. Namely, the lack of Edd.
He wasn't in the shot. At all. The spot where he was supposed to be was just a shade of purple as was the rest of the tree. The rope that held him there was gone as well. Eddy was looking over and was talking as if he was still there, but yet no audio again. Now his dialogue was low and sounded like a low drone, save for one clear as day part in his words. "Edd's a goner" Now, the line was obviously used to reference big Ed down below, but it was still pretty chilling to hear since Edd and Ed don't really have any difference in pronunciation. The scene continued on, Ed really giving those Kankers a run for their money. Now the screen really fucked up. At the point where Edd was supposed to run by with his quip of 'We're not done yet Eddy', the screen went black and white yet again with an even louder static explosion. I couldn't hear myself as I know I was cursing up a storm. I went to reach again for the power on the TV, but again was cut off by something else. The screen was still in fuck up mode, with the static breaking my ears and the brightness dimmed to 'can't see shit'. However it brightened a bit and showed the scene was different. I was looking at what looked like the wooden plank wall that the Eds usually either break or sit on. In very drippy black paint, the words 'YoU ForGot' were slapped on. The screen stayed frozen here as I could hear something else coming through the speaker.
It was Edd again. He was repeating a line from what I thought was a different episode, and he was droning it on and extending it like someone was deathly moaning out. The static took a stop and was instantly silent as the line was finished. "REMEMBER" The screen then slowly brightened. What was there was disturbing, as now we were obviously at the scene where Edd was calling the Kankers 'dainty do-something darlings' and welcoming them home, as was supposed to be. But he wasn't speaking, and was frozen in his position as his mouth was wide open in his goofy smile. The black and white coloring was still in full force, the white looking clearer through the static and the black as dark as could be. Then Edd's voice began repeating the word from before. "REMEMBER. REMEMBER. REMEMBER." It continued on, Edd's animation still frozen as his eyes slowly sank into a dark black, nothing in sight as if he lost them. His teeth and tongue were also drowned in black and burn marks started to appear on the screen. "REMEMBER REMEMBER" I had to hold my ears, I didn't understand what was going on and the volume was fucking killing me. He was screaming it now. I swear his voice was fucking screaming right at me from the TV, and the quality was way too good for a VHS at this point. He was pissed off. He was yelling at me to remember. I finally gave up and dove for the power button, shutting off the TV with a sweet silence following.
I hit eject and took the tape out. I thought carefully as the words repeated again and again in my head. Now, as I held the tape in my hand, taking a seat on the couch, I really gave it some thought. I know it's just a tape, and I know it wasn't real. I was probably having one hell of a daydream. But that haunting image of his face, that screaming. Just the tone of voice in which he was screaming, was he angry? He was mad.
And the only conclusion I had at that moment, he was angry I forgot about me forgetting him and, or the tape. I forgot him, and I left him alone. I tossed the tape back inside the VCR and resumed from where I left it. The episode played out perfectly with the usual subpar quality of the VHS tape. Ed and Edd were still chasing the Kankers and Eddy was still a pussy. I rewound the tape and played it again. The screen was okay, and the sound stayed the same. Edd was normally speaking and was in the scenes as he was supposed to be. As I opted to stay and watch the rest of the tape again and again, the scene with Edd saying 'love knows no bounds turtledoves' or something like that, his eyes and mouth was always black. Only here it happened.
He won't forgive me.
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