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Showing posts from December, 2012

The Wreck

My eyes snap open. I’m upside down. It takes a minute for my vision to focus. I look around at my surroundings. I’m in a car. I close my eyes to concentrate, but I can’t remember what’s happening or how I crashed. I hear a dripping sound. I open my eyes to see a dark liquid pooling on the ground. I touch my head with my left hand and feel the wet, warm sensation of blood. I shake my head and take a deep breath. I reach up with my left hand and undo my seatbelt, causing me to fall. As soon as I drop, I instinctively brace my fall with my right arm. A loud crunch echoes through the car and a sharp pain shoots through my arm. I scream and turn my body to get the pressure off of my arm. I use my left hand to open the car door and crawl out. I stagger to my feet and look down at my arm. In the pale moonlight, I see the cause of my agony. Mu humorous is sticking of my arm. The bone glints off of the light from the moon. I close my eyes and sigh. A shuffling in the bushes makes me open my ey...

An Ode to English Plurals

We'll begin with a box, and the  plural is boxes, But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes. One fowl  is a goose, but two are called geese, Yet the plural of moose should  never be meese. You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice, Yet  the plural of house is houses, not hice. If the plural  of man is always called men, Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen? If I speak of my foot and show you my feet, And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet? If one is a tooth and a whole set are  teeth, Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?  Then one may be that, and three would be those, Yet hat in  the plural would never be hose, And the plural of cat is cats, not  cose. We speak of a brother and also of brethren, But though we say mother, we never say methren. Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and  him, But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!  Let's face it - English is...

An Egg

It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me. And that’s when you met me. “What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?” “You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point mincing words. “There was a…a truck and it was skidding…” “Yup.” I said “I… I died?” “Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies.” I said. You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?” “More or less,” I said. “Are you god?” You asked. “Yup.” I replied. “I’m God.” “My kids… my wife,” you said. “What about them?” “Will they be alright?” “That what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.” You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I jus...

Mummy, Can I?

“Oh thank you so much for coming at a late notice,” the woman said as soon as she answered the door. “No problem, miss. It’s my job. What can I do for you?” I replied naturally with a smile. “Well my sink’s been acting up lately. I’ve tried fixing it myself but it’s no good. Please, come in. I’ll show you the way.” She stepped aside, making a gesture to invite me in. I nodded with a smile, ready to provide service as usual. She led me into the living room. “My son is sleeping in his room. Can I ask you to try to keep it quiet?” “Yes, of course. I’ll do my best.” I couldn’t help but notice that she was missing two fingers on one hand. Not wanting to be rude, I made no mention of it. “That would be much appreciated. Would you like a drink? A cold soda or maybe just water?” she offered. “Oh water is fine, thank you.” “I’ll be right back then. Go on and take a seat.” She slowly made her way into the kitchen but not without glancing towards the hallway. I couldn’t help but notice how pale a...

Don’t Go Into The Basement

You know, Mom, I remember now how it all started. It was right after moving to the new house. How old was I? Four, maybe five? I was so young. So innocent. So unsuspecting. The new house was beautiful, Mom. Do you remember how I used to run from room to room? You always laugh so hard when you recount those times. We were so happy. All of us. The house was so big, much bigger than the old house. This one had two floors. The main floor had the living room and three bedrooms: Judy’s, Dad’s and your’s, and my bedroom, at the end of the hall. Do you remember what I used to tell you about the basement though? I always told you to not go into the basement. You would brush it off. Wave away my fears. You probably don’t remember me telling you at all. But I remember. I can never forget. It all started with going downstairs on my own a few times. When I would go down there to get something, I would see things moving. Small, black things. In the corners, on top of the TV cabinet, in the hallway, ...

Anna

He liked to volunteer in the psych ward of his local hospital. His real job was as a stockbroker, but the stresses got to him sometimes and he needed an outlet. In the past he’d turned to booze to relieve the pressure, but that had taken him to places he hoped never to revisit. He didn’t know why it helped him so much to be in the hospital. He didn’t particularly like the crazies they made him work with; in fact he thought most of them were beyond help. He supposed it was really Anna that kept him coming back. Anna was just a little girl, maybe ten or twelve at the most. She shouldn’t really have been in the ward with the adults, but his small town wasn’t wealthy enough to have separate housing for minors. He felt sorry for all the kids who had to bunk with these terminal wackjobs. Or he would, if Anna weren’t the only one there under 35. That just made it sadder, he supposed. He felt a need to protect this little girl from the frightening company she kept, so he had promised himse...